Sabra Staudenmaier

The Space Between Light and Darkness BREAK THE HOLD FOUNDATION

August 24, 2019 by Sabra Staudenmaier

Changing the Conversation about Youth Mental Health

Mental health issues can be difficult to understand. Struggles of the mind are laden with kaleidoscopic subtleties that can complicate their management and resolution. How can we help someone who is in a place where the pain and suffering in their mind is so terrible that it outweighs everything else life offers? Between the light of wellness and the darkness of mental illness there is a dim place that is under-discussed. It is here that a social network, community, family, friends and self-care plays a crucial role; this is where life-saving opportunities are being missed.

Through a new and innovative program, the Break The Hold (BTH) Foundation of Pleasantville is making strides by breaking down misconceptions about mental illness and building a safety network that mitigates the real risk factors. They are, in effect, extending branches for those suffering to grab hold of and implementing safety nets to catch those who are spiraling into darkness.

Driven by the love for their middle son, Brian T. Halloran, who lost his battle with depression in January of 2018, Pleasantville residents Brian and Jolina Halloran are determined to help those suffering the way he did. Through the BTH Foundation, named after their son’s initials, the

Suicide is the second leading cause of death for ages 10-24. Each day in the U.S., there is an average of over 3,470 attempts by young people in grades 9-12. Four out of Five teens who attempt suicide have given clear warning signs. They don’t want to die.

Source: bthbreakthehold.org

Hallorans provide school and community-based advocacy programs that promote emotional wellness, resilience and suicide prevention in Pleasantville and nearby communities. Their program focuses on suicide education, raising awareness of the warning signs and empowering young people to have the courage to communicate about this difficult but important issue. The BTH Foundation is giving the community the tools to deal with mental health preventatively and is referring those suffering to the appropriate places to get the help they need. The outstanding progress the BTH Foundation has made merits attention.

The Education Platform – BTH 360

In short, the BTH Foundation’s mission is suicide prevention. The BTH program advocates a safety net system of “Recognizing and Referring”; teaching those in the community how to recognize someone suffering and refer them to receive appropriate help. “We often hear that a friend had seen a flag that could have been addressed but felt that saying something about their friend’s struggles is snitching. The message needs to get out that keeping friends healthy and happy is the right thing to do,” says Brian Halloran.

When BTH is contacted, they have a team of clinicians who, based on a triage system, put together an action plan to help connect those in need with viable options and work to overcome barriers to treatment such as financial cost.

Prevention through education is key. The BTH Foundation has worked alongside the Pleasantville High School (PHS) administration and a team of local psychologists. Together, they have developed programming for the school district that satisfies the NY State mandates for mental health in the curriculum. Their program is focused on teaching Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), which is evidence-based training for emotional regulation. DBT uses mindfulness strategies to manage emotions, increasing student’s tolerance of negative emotions.

The idea is that everyone will be speaking the same language, everyone will learn to respond a little bit more thoughtfully rather than emotionally. We must get to the kids early. They need to be able to understand and communicate what is going on in their heads,” says Halloran.

Last September, ninth graders in PHS had 16 hours of mandated mental health education incorporated into the school curriculum. This coming school year, fifth graders will receive 10 hours of the program. Within 4 years everyone at PHS will have had 26 hours of DBT training. In addition, all staff in the Pleasantville High School, Middle School and Elementary School are receiving 8 hours of DBT training. Parent workshops are offered regularly.

It is especially important to educate teens before they go to college. The BTH Foundation arranges senior transition meetings to help. “Adolescents lose many protective factors once they leave home to go away to college. Many risk factors increase at this time,” Halloran warns.

BTH is sharing their model with neighboring school districts around Westchester. For example, this Fall, the program will be rolled out to ninth graders at Alexander Hamilton High School in Elmsford. The Foundation is also working to get government resources.

Dismantling the Stigma

Those suffering with mental illness are not the only ones in the dark. Some people think of suicide as “the ultimate selfish act” and wonder “how could they do that to their family and friends?” These judgements are often based on misconceptions. Most who die by suicide do not want to end their life; they want to escape their pain. Suicide is not a rational decision; it is one made under extreme duress.

A person trapped in a burning building might reasonably make the decision to jump out of the window rather than suffer the pain and anguish of being burned by the fire. A person jumping off a bridge to end their life is trying to escape pain that is very real, just like the pain of burning to death. The instinct to escape mental suffering can be as powerful as the instinct to escape physical pain. BTH is trying to break down social barriers to recovery by addressing misconceptions and normalizing the conversation about mental health.

Mental health is a public health issue requiring the help of the entire community. We have lifeguards and life preservers to mitigate the risks of swimming, the Heimlich maneuver to prevent choking and defibrillators in the case of cardiac arrest. Public controls are placed in countless situations to manage health risks. The BTH system of Recognizing and Referring is something everyone can help implement. The community should not underestimate how important they are.

Are you OK? Is something wrong? Can I help you? Those were the words I desperately wanted to hear.” – Kevin Hines, Suicide The Ripple Effect

The Art of Mental Wellness

We can’t stop thoughts from coming into our heads, but we can cultivate an awareness of them. Just because a thought is in your head does not mean it’s true. Skills can be taught so thoughts can be assessed and managed. For someone struggling with a mental illness like depression, thoughts of self-criticism and self-doubt can grow to become powerful and even debilitating. Thoughts like: “everything I do is wrong”, “nobody likes me”, “everyone I love would be better off without me”, “I have nothing to give”, “I am not able to live up to what everyone needs from me” and “I am a failure.”

Living with these ruminating thoughts is frightening and painful.

Unable to control and manage overwhelming negative thoughts, and not understanding what is happening in your head, can lead to a feeling of being trapped. Panic can ensue and bring with it impulses to escape the epic amount of mental and emotional suffering that the negative thoughts create.

The shame of what is secretly happening inside one’s mind prevents resolution and the thoughts continue to spiral. “I felt unable to function. I was being crippled by my struggle as the pain got louder and louder. It might have looked like I was ok on the outside, but the amount of work it took to maintain this false appearance was not sustainable,” recalls one survivor of depression.

The shame that prevents one from reaching out for help is a huge barrier to treatment. The person suffers internally in silence as their condition worsens and signs are missed.

Those who could help don’t know how to read the signs indicating there is an issue, and if they do sense there is something going on they don’t know how to react. If the person continues to suffer in silence, they are unlikely to get better. Depending on the sufferer’s resilience and stress factors, the bubble can ultimately break.

Please remember to be kind. You never know what someone else is going through. Jolina Halloran.

Mental health struggles are managed best when openly discussed. “There is a false belief that talking about suicide will escalate the idea. However, the opposite is, in fact, the case. An adolescent or young adult who is spiraling downward benefits immensely from simply talking about their thoughts”, says Dr. Gayle Augenbaum, a child and adolescent psychiatry specialist who practices in Armonk. BTH gives people a safe and accessible place for these conversations to take place. These simple conversations can deter unhealthy choices such as self-medicating with drugs and alcohol or worse.

Ultimately the BTH Foundation encourages people to be involved in their own self-care. “If you want to beat this mental illness problem, you have to be involved in the process. Everyone can help and we need a network and a community of support, but it is also necessary to take effort in and be proactive in your own self-care,” advises Halloran. Just as an individual with asthma pays extra attention to their breath, and a person with a food allergy has a heightened awareness of what they eat; similarly, a person who suffers from “brain pain” can become aware of the thoughts that enter their minds and learn how to manage them.

You don’t necessarily beat depression once and then it is gone. It is often something you live with throughout your life. When a person who suffers from depression is well, they can learn to practice preventative measures to maintain and manage their mental health. Mental illnesses like depression can break down one’s resilience over time and can turn thoughts into irrational behavior. But the key is “over time”; that’s where the opportunity lies, between the light and the darkness.

How Mindfulness Can Help

The principles behind mindfulness are the basis for much of DBT. Mindfulness concepts like self-compassion, non-judgement and gratitude can redirect thoughts from the darkness into the light. “Meditation helps bring awareness to your thoughts. You are not blocking thoughts but relating to them differently, letting them come and go and observing them. This will help in life because you will be able to recognize when thoughts are not helpful and can dismiss them instead of intensifying them which can lead to sadness or anxiety,” says Jodi Baretz, a holistic based therapist from the Center for Health and Healing in Mt. Kisco.

There are other methods to proactively keep one’s mental health in shape. Exercise can help in many ways including shifting one’s focus from the mind to the body. Getting enough sleep can play a big role as well.

The Next Generation

There is concern that the next generation is especially at risk of depression. Technology fosters social isolation; the omnipresent screens that children and teens are growing up with are barriers to human interaction. Mental illness breeds on social isolation; humans are meant to be in groups and care about one another.

While it is extraordinarily difficult for an adult to manage a mental illness, it is even more difficult for a child or adolescent. “Kids and teenagers don’t have the right words to name their emotions and their frontal lobes are not finished developing. Therefore, they are more impulsive and more reactive and tend to be more rigid with whatever they are feeling, not recognizing that there is hope for change.” Says Augenbaum. Teens don’t have the ability yet to understand that situations aren’t permanent. This is a learned lesson that takes time and life experience they don’t yet have. And so, the risk factors continue to pile up.

Walking into the Light

The Hallorans have suffered the unimaginable in losing their son Brian. But with the work of the BTH Foundation, steps have been taken towards compassion and understanding and away from judgement and misconception. Every time a teen who has gone down the road of darkness is given the tools to recover, Brian is there. With Brian’s light leading the way, steps are being taken in the right direction. This past June, the community showed their support by participating in the BTH Foundation’s second suicide awareness walk. The steps they took communicated a clear message to those suffering from mental illness: you are not alone in this fight; we will walk into the light with you. For more information, please visit: www.bthbreakthehold.org

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline:

800-273-TALK (8255) or Text “TALK” to 741-741

A Bit About Brian

Brian was a beloved son, brother and friend. He was well-liked, smart and athletic. He was friendly and had a lot of empathy for others. His parents knew he was a good person but “didn’t realize how kind he was”. After he passed away, friends and acquaintances contacted his parents and told them that if Brian saw someone who seemed sad he would not hesitate to reach out to them.

Brian appeared to most to be a typical teenager, but underneath his strong exterior he was suffering from depression. Depression can come and go. It can appear to be managed but then come back. Though Brian had been doing well, still the day came in January 2018 when his parents got a knock on their door. Brian had died by suicide while away at school in South Carolina. Before Brian died he reached out to several people but was not able to connect with anyone.

The Devil in a Day

May 31, 2019 by Sabra Staudenmaier

(L-R): Matt Chmielecki and Walter Staudenmaier

The Devil’s Path is considered one of the most difficult hikes in the country. Located in the Catskill Mountains about a two-hour drive north of Chappaqua; the trail is approximately 25 miles long with six peaks and 16,000 feet of elevation. For most brave adventurers who take on this challenge, it is tackled over the course of two to three days; but for the past four years an ambitious group of Dads from Chappaqua have partaken in what has become an annual tradition of completing the hike in one grueling 14-hour stretch.

When the weather starts to get warm, but before summer’s heat sets in, the men call in a personal day at work and forgo their usual train commute into the City. They pack their cars with supplies and convoy north to the Catskills.

Practice hikes take place in advance. Brian Cook takes his training very seriously. To prepare for his inaugural hike he was often seen walking around town with a weighted backpack to simulate the supplies he would be carrying. Andy Shaiken, who has also completed the New York City marathon, considers the hike to be “more difficult and more rewarding” in comparison.

The men depart on a Thursday night. They leave one car full of supplies at the halfway point and another at the end. It is not an out and back trail, so they finish at a different point from where they start. They then check into the Kaatskill Mountain Club Hotel and attempt to go to bed early; but nerves prevent much sleep. At 4 a.m. they wake up and the long day begins.

Walter Staudenmaier, who will be hiking the Devil’s Path for the fourth year this Spring, packs seven bacon and banana sandwiches, fourteen GU energy gels and twelve liters of a 50/50 water and Gatorade mix as his personal fuel of choice.

They rendezvous in the parking lot and head to the trail for a 4:45 a.m. sharp departure. There is excited and nervous banter at the beginning. A brisk pace is set. It’s dark, so headlamps are needed for the first 45-minute gradual uphill climb. Putting one foot in front of the other, the monotony of the hike sets in and the first hill quickly disappears. A regimen is established; the hikers briefly stop every 45 minutes to take salt tablets and supplements to offset what their bodies are expending. Few additional stops are taken.

The first half of the hike consists of three intense peaks. “There is an incredibly steep descent to the halfway point of the trail that rattles your knees, your toes are banging into your boots at every step.” Recalls Staudenmaier.

At the halfway point, the men take a well-deserved 30-minute break. They get off their feet, massage their legs, change clothes, replenish supplies, use tiger balm to try to get muscles loose and prepare to set off again.

The second half begins with a torturous vertical climb and exhaustion quickly sets in. A third of the way into the second half the hikers feel extremely uncomfortable. The last four hours are “complete misery; every single step hurts.”

(L-R): Chappaqua Dads, Brian Cook, Andrew Skala, Andy Shaiken, Walter Staudenmaier, and Eric Rose

About halfway through the second half is the point of no return. Until then, the path is always no more than a couple of miles away from a put out; but towards the end that option is lost because it’s the same distance to finish as all other exit points. At about eleven hours in, with approximately three hours remaining, there is no way out except to finish.

“Hiking for 14+ hours straight is a whole lot easier when you are sharing the struggle with good friends. It also helps to have a cooler full of beer at the end of the trail waiting for us.” Says Matt Chmielecki, a Cross Fit enthusiast who will be hiking the trail for the third year this Spring.

Overall, the first half of the hike is much more technical and challenging; there are a lot of rock ledges and obstacles. The second half is easier but exhaustion gets in the way of appreciating it. The fatigue gets so intense in the second half, the hikers don’t take many photos; only at the very end.

The journey shifts from struggle to relief once the hike is complete. A steak dinner at the hotel is the final reward, in addition to the satisfaction of having completed “the Devil” in a day.

Local Women Forge Unexpected Career Paths to Success

April 18, 2019 by Sabra Staudenmaier

(L- R): Elise Orlando, Susan Draper, Kelly Leonard, Kathy Benardo and Holly Blum
PHOTOS by Carolyn Simpson, DOUBLEVISION PHOTOGRAPHERS

A common question children are asked is “What do you want to be when you grow up?” This question infers that there should be a short and simple answer. Yet, realistically, the answer is often quite complex. Many factors impact career journeys: economic fluctuations, family needs and personal maturation are just a few. Whether stemming from a prior career or from working as a stay-at-home mom, experiences rich with growth opportunities accrue continuously throughout one’s lifetime making the answer to this question far from straightforward.

“Career paths aren’t linear. They shouldn’t be seen as a continuous assembly line leading directly from graduation to retirement.” says Mindy Berkower, a former Chappaqua resident and Chief Client Officer and General Counsel, iRelaunch LLC (irelaunch.com), a pioneering company in career reentry. “Women may not only off-ramp from and on-ramp back to their careers over a lifetime–they may also pivot toward a number of different careers, tapping their extensive transferable skills and building new skills and developing new interests along the way.”

Growth doesn’t stop at any point throughout life. It is not possible to predict where life’s twists and turns will lead; there are too many moving variables. Yet, as exemplified by the stories of five inspirational local women, unexpected detours can translate into unique and valuable opportunities.

Investing in Personal Objectives

Chappaqua resident Elise Orlando worked on a trading floor for an investment bank assisting companies through the public offering process for over ten years before she became pregnant

with her son, the oldest of her three children. A year later her daughter was born and eventually her family grew to include a second daughter.

After her son’s birth, Elise went back to work full-time. As time went by she found herself becoming more and more concerned with her son’s development. Shortly after she brought her middle child home from the hospital, Elise’s son was diagnosed with autism. This became the impetus for her career change. Giving up a career in finance was easy for Elise because she had a new and important purpose that took precedence over corporate finance: to care for her son and her newborn.

Elise quickly realized there were few educational opportunities in her community for children with autism. Through research, she learned of a cutting-edge teaching model pioneered at UCLA. She set up a home program, hired a team of therapists and taught her son using this program’s “Applied Behavior Analysis.” It was during this period she realized he could learn and this teaching method would be able to reach him. She connected with other local families who were in a similar position. Together, they established a nonprofit group to raise funds for autism education. These efforts ultimately lead to the opening of the Devereux Millwood Learning Center for 5-21 year olds with autism in Millwood in 1996. “There were many challenges getting there, but my goal to have a place for my son to learn was realized.” The Devereux Learning Center has since moved and is now located in Mount Kisco.

Elise feels that her career has followed a somewhat unique path in that she didn’t have a choice about many of the decisions she made. Her family was growing; she wanted to provide opportunities for her son and to be there for her daughters. For Elise, her family’s needs provided an abundance of motivation and a clear purpose. Today, she continues to advocate for her son who is now an adult. She serves on the Board of Directors at Extraordinary Ventures New York (www.EVNY.org) in Mount Kisco, NY, and FECA (Foundation for Empowering Citizens with Autism (www.fecainc.org) working to provide opportunities for adults with autism and other developmental disabilities within their communities.

Following Your Passion

Holly Blum was a Vice President at a healthcare public relations firm. She was successful and proud of the work she was doing; she was helping to promote medications and treatments that were saving lives. However, when Holly became a mother she found the demands of her job were not in alignment with her family’s priorities. She decided to pause her career to be with her kids.

While at home in Chappaqua, Holly opined on what she enjoyed about the work she had done in public relations. She knew she loved the parts of her job that related to writing and working with patients. She especially liked learning about people’s stories as she prepared them to interact with the media.

Since she was a young girl, Holly has had a gift for expressing emotion through writing; the countless notes and cards she wrote to her family were an important part of her childhood. As she grew older it became clear that this was a natural talent and passion.

Then, one day, Holly was at a wedding listening to “the worst wedding speech she had ever heard” when she had an epiphany. Holly’s speech writing company, A Speech to Remember (www.aspeechtoremember.com), was born. The company focuses on speeches for life’s special occasions. The ideas come from her clients and each speech is unique. Holly gathers information, and drafts the speech in collaboration with them; taking great care that authenticity is preserved. Besides loving her work, Holly appreciates that her job has the flexibility to allow her to be present for her family.

Holly advises people evaluating career paths to think about their interests and skills; then ask family and friends what strengths they perceive you to have, to help pinpoint what direction to go in. It can be hard to rise to the challenge of pursuing your passions but “sometimes it takes a leap of faith and you just have to believe in yourself.”

The Birth of a New Career

Kathy Benardo of Chappaqua has a master’s degree in art history and spent five years as a product developer for the retail division of the Metropolitan Museum of Art, and then eight years at the Museum of Modern Art. In 2002 she married Sanford Benardo, an adoption lawyer who was just beginning to branch out into third party reproduction law.

After having their second child in 2005, they decided to create the Northeast Assisted Fertility Group (www.assistedfertility.com), a surrogacy and egg donation program that filled a need for these services in the Northeast (most of these programs were on the West Coast). It was a natural transition for Kathy, who felt that she had gotten all she could from museum product development, whereas third-party reproduction was a growing field.

The husband and wife team avoids the expected marital conflicts through a clear division of duties. Kathy’s husband handles the surrogacy side of the business and she directs the egg donor program. As much as Kathy enjoyed being a part of the art world, owning a business allows her the flexibility to work from home and be with her kids after school. She feels that her new career path is more stressful, but helping people build families is also more rewarding. In her second career, Kathy applies the same creativity and entrepreneurial spirit fostered in her museum work. “You are always you, no matter what job you do. You bring your strengths along with you and can apply them to whatever career path you choose to take.”

Nurturing Your Ambition

Kelly Leonard O’Keefe of Chappaqua had a long and successful career in book publishing. When a change in executive management occurred at her company, Kelly and several of her contemporaries were laid off. She used this opportunity to set up her own digital marketing consulting company that she still manages serving authors and local nonprofits.

In 2016, Kelly’s beloved father passed away. She witnessed hospice for a second time in the family and it resonated with her deeply. Being with her loved ones during their last days and hours of life was a spiritual and transformative experience. In the months following her father’s passing, Kelly realized she wanted to focus on end-of-life care

and hospice as a new career. With no healthcare background, she was starting from square one.

She applied to a CNA (Certified Nursing Assistant) program at Westchester Community College and was accepted. The 12-week course included over 90 hours of classroom instruction and 30 hours of hands-on clinical work in a nursing home. The direct care experience of helping non-family members convinced Kelly further that this was work she could do as a new profession.

Since completing the course and passing the New York State CNA Competency Exam, Kelly volunteers with Hospice Care in Westchester & Putnam (part of Visiting Nurse Association of Hudson Valley) and was recently hired by Home Helpers Tri-County, in-home care serving Westchester, Putnam, and Fairfield counties.

Realizing Your Dreams

Susan Draper from Armonk was a buyer at Saks Fifth Avenue before she became the Director of Women’s Planning at Barney’s New York. While working, she enjoyed spending her spare time being active in her community through her role as Commissioner of Outreach on the vestry at her church.

She took some time off from work when her youngest child was born. For three years, she focused on her family and the volunteer work she found so rewarding. When she returned to the workforce, Susan decided to take a job as a part-time trainer and spinning instructor. She enjoyed exercising and staying in shape and this role allowed enough flexibility to be there for her kids. The yoga studio Susan attended was having financial troubles and was about to close. Though she was new to yoga, Susan thought the studio was “simply too pretty to close.” In a completely unexpected venture, she became the new owner of Quest Yoga Arts in Mount Kisco.

Susan embarked on a yoga teacher training program and used the buying skills from her days at Saks to create a fitness wear boutique in the reception area of the studio. Her vision was to offer yoga classes that were accessible to everyone, not just expert yogis.

Susan loved her time at Quest. She created a community filled with warmth and found the experience of teaching and helping others feel better to be very uplifting. Yoga has brought her so much joy over the years–from an opportunity to teach side by side with her daughter to occasionally teaching yoga to her son’s college swim team.

However, in planning for the future Susan reexamined her path and decided to return to her educational roots. During her time as an undergraduate at Kenyon College, she had excelled in math and science. Back then, she had considered going to medical school but wasn’t comfortable with the debt an advanced degree would require. However, the timing was now right and she decided she was ready to pursue her interest in healthcare.

Susan completed her nursing degree with honors and was subsequently hired at Greenwich Hospital. It was daunting to start her first day in a stressful career at age fifty-five, but the caring and nurturing role of being a nurse is Susan’s clear calling.

Finding Fulfillment Through Reinvention

Self-discovery can be a lengthy excavation process and can take a lifetime to explore. Circumstances inevitably change and careers often must be modified in tandem. Adaptability, resilience and self-confidence play an important role in navigating flexuous career paths. These women stepped out of their comfort zones to embark on new experiences, finding success and fulfillment through reinvention.

The question of what one wants to be when they grow up is difficult to answer because it infers that growth stops at a certain point in adulthood. But growth doesn’t end when adulthood begins; it is ongoing, continuing throughout a lifetime. Therefore, the answer to this question is ever evolving, making the journey of a career’s path as significant as the final destination.

Mindful Moms Lakeside Meditation Series Continues this Summer

April 18, 2019 by Sabra Staudenmaier

At the end of a dirt path hidden on an ordinary street in Millwood there is a stretch of sand that leads to a small private lake. Every few weeks throughout the summer months this becomes the location where a group of mindful moms take their meditation practice outdoors. The beach is quaint, the lake reflects the trees, sky and clouds; the sun shimmers and sparkles over the surface of the water. It is the ideal setting to bask in the present moment.

Jodi Baretz, a mindfulness-based psychotherapist and holistic health coach, and author of the Amazon best-selling book Mindful is the New Skinny, has made it her life’s work to help people maximize joy through meditation and other mindfulness techniques. For almost a decade, she has worked to help clients with stress, food issues and relationship problems so they can feel and look their best. She offers individual therapy and coaching through The Center for Health and Healing in Mt Kisco and has pioneered several successful mindful mom’s programs, including her new program: “Club Mindful – A Gym for the Mind”. Baretz developed the summer lake meditation series several years ago and it has grown to become a highlight on the calendars within the local mindfulness community.

“There are so many benefits to practicing mindfulness. I have become a better partner, mother and friend. I have always found water to be so calming so the lake meditations have been a wonderful addition to my mindfulness practice.” says mindful mom, Tamara Leopold from Armonk.

Inspired by the beauty and peacefulness of the private lake as well as Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) founder Jon Kabat-Zinn’s well-known lake meditation, Baretz facilitates her outdoor meditation program surrounded by nature’s beauty. All that is needed to participate is a towel, a bottle of water and the desire to destress. Sitting on the lake’s beach with legs crossed, eyes closed the sunshine can be soaked up. The winter is long and opportunities like this are rare and valuable.

The image of the lake evokes peace and tranquility. We are reminded that there is something larger than ourselves which allows us to find humility in the grand beauty of nature. Zinn’s meditation offers an awareness of what the lake can teach us symbolically; “carrying a vast reservoir of mindfulness within your heart, we can be the lake in silence.”

Baretz has been known to incorporate a variety of meditations into her lake series. Sometimes there is a walking meditation or a body scan meditation. She often reads inspirational parables that encourage the mindfulness practices of living in the present, practicing non-judgment, compassion and gratitude. Regardless of what form the experience takes it is a relaxing way to spend an hour doing something most people don’t get enough of. It is a time to restore and appreciate the beauty and goodness of life.

Baretz feels that “meditation takes on a whole new level when you’re outside in nature. You are able to immerse yourself and pay attention to the beauty that you normally miss by being busy.”

More information on the lake meditation series and other mindfulness programs can be found at jodibaretz.com

An Appetite for Generosity

March 8, 2019 by Sabra Staudenmaier

(L-R): (914) Cares 4th Annual Empty Bowls Committee, Dana Berk, Jodi Falbaum, Lisa Samkoff, Melissa Levine, Jillian Pohly, Jessica Reinmann, Mike Slomsky, Dawn Greenberg, Lena Cavanna, Doug Alpuche and Lauren Stern

(914) Cares Fourth Annual Empty Bowls Event Raises $120,000 to Fight Hunger in Westchester

On the cold Sunday evening before Thanksgiving, a warmth radiated from Crabtree’s Kittle House Restaurant and Inn. The smell of hearty food filled the air. A simple meal of soup, bread and hors d’oeuvres was being prepared in the kitchen. An abstract sculpture stood inside the entrance of this quaint venue. It was made of ceramic bowls and cans of soup, layered in rows that progressively narrowed from bottom to top, forming a tree. The tree symbolized the upcoming holiday season. The bowls were individually and uniquely hand-painted by members of the community. They were all empty; a reminder that many cannot afford to fill their bowls. The guests of the evening were there to support the Empty Bowls Westchester annual fundraiser to help the fight against hunger.

Throughout the restaurant, soup and bread stations were set up alongside additional displays of painted bowls. Signs explaining the work being done to end hunger sat beside more of the painted bowls. The Mount Kisco Interfaith Food Pantry displayed a sign saying, “We fed 41,791 people last year”. The Boys & Girls Club of Northern Westchester showed a sign informing, “We serve over 80,000 nutritious meals each year.” Hillside Food Outreach had a sign that shared, “We have over 300 volunteers that pack & deliver to our clients.”

Celebrities Help the Cause

Set aside from the main event, the Kittle House’s Tap room was lined with tables showcasing larger bowls that had been signed by celebrities who support this important cause. Celebrities who participated by donating signed bowls included Yankees legend Mariano Rivera, Bon Jovi’s Richie Sambora, author and activist Cecile Richards, US golfing great Tom Watson, Bill and Hillary Clinton, author James Patterson, HQ Trivia Host Scott Rogowsky and Pinkalicious children’s author Victoria Kahn. These “Celebrity Bowls” were an important part of the fundraising effort. They were available to bid on in the evening’s highly anticipated silent auction.

Empty Bowls Westchester is a division of (914) Cares–an organization that supports local Westchester based non-profits that focus on basic human needs: food, clothing, shelter, medical care and education. According to the Feeding Westchester (formerly known as the Westchester Food Bank), one in five residents of Westchester is food insecure, which means approximately 200,000 people are hungry or at risk for hunger. Each year, an Empty Bowls Committee is formed to run the local arm of the international grassroots effort to raise money and awareness in the fight to end hunger in our community.

Grant recipients (L-R): Kelly Housman, Mt. Kisco Interfaith Food Pantry; Susan Bretti, Community Center of Northern Westchester; Clare Murray, Community Center of Northern Westchester and Robin Karp, Pleasantville Interfaith Emergency Food Pantry

A Community Wide Effort

Beginning in the spring, (914) Cares Co-Founders Dawn Greenberg and Jessica Reinmann work with volunteers from the community who donate their time to hand paint bowls, one by one. Members from Congregation Sons of Israel Briarcliff, Pace University and Strauss Paper employees along with several Girl Scout troops are among those who helped paint bowls which, this year, totaled over 250. Once painted, A Maze in Pottery in Briarcliff Manor, a generous supporter of this cause, fires all the painted bowls in their kiln.

Local Grant Recipients Utilize Event’s Funds

Local organizations who are on the front lines in the fight against hunger apply to receive grants from the funds raised. This year six grant recipients were selected. These organizations were Bread of Life, The Boys and Girls Club of Northern Westchester, The Community Center of Northern Westchester, Hillside Food Outreach, The Interfaith Emergency Food Pantry of Pleasantville and The Mount Kisco Interfaith Food Pantry.

The recipients of this year’s grants were extremely appreciative for funding they received, but the community members who attended the fundraiser were just as thankful for the work the organizations do. Whether it’s through rescuing food so that it does not go to waste, delivering food to the sick or elderly, or running a food pantry year -round; through the grace of these organizations, the gap between those who are able to give and those who are in need is being bridged. The people who champion this cause maintain that they get more than they give from the work they do.

Ways to Get Involved

Empty Bowls Westchester and (914) Cares are always looking for the help of generous people. Whatever one can give is significant and makes a difference. Reinmann encourages the community to continue to support this cause by hosting a bowl painting party, becoming a sponsor or attending the next Empty Bowls Westchester event. Celebrity–signed bowls are always welcome donations for the silent auction portion of the fundraiser. There are many ways to get involved.

In Reinmann’s experience, people are very generous during the holiday season, but help often declines in January and February. The depth of winter, however, is when the need for help is the greatest. She encourages people to reach out to local food banks to find out what is needed and run a drive to raise those items accordingly.

The Empty Bowls event was a success but there is still much more work to be done. Since its inception, four years ago, Empty Bowls Westchester has raised almost half a million dollars. Greenberg and Reinmann aim to continue to support the growth of the program. They want to help create a community where basic fundamental needs are available to everyone. A place where poverty and hunger is not temporarily mended with a band aid but rather where the cycle of poverty is ended.

When the evening was over, every attendee received a hand-painted bowl to remind them of all the empty bowls in the world that still need to be filled and to inspire them to continue to support ending hunger. The ultimate goal, according to Reinmann, is “the day when (914) Cares is no longer needed, that will be the best day ever.”

For more information on how to support Empty Bowls Westchester, please visit 914cares.org

Some Really Super Bowls

Over the past four years, a number of very special bowls have been auctioned during the Empty Bowls silent auction. Artist in Residence and committee member, Melissa Levine, painted most of this year’s bowls that were sent to celebrities who volunteered to sign them to help raise money for this cause. A Maze in Pottery Briarcliff Manor’s Nancy Beard generously assisted by lending her artistic talent to paint some of the celebrity-signed bowls. For this year’s auction, comedian Jim Belushi did his own artwork on the bowl he signed and donated.

The bidding on celebrity bowls starts at $125 and bowls can go for any amount higher. To date, the bowl that has gotten the highest bid was from last year’s silent auction. It was a bowl signed by the entire Philadelphia Eagles football team and was won by a bid of $1,700.

Some celebrities, for example Bill and Hillary Clinton, are regular supporters, and have signed a bowl to be auctioned each year.

On occasion, a bowl will be sent to a celebrity for signing and the celebrity will return the bowl with an additional item to be included in the auction. Two years ago, musician James Taylor added a signed guitar to his donation. For this year’s auction, Richie Sambora donated a signed guitar along with his signed bowl.