The Inside Press

Magazines serving the communities of Northern Westchester

Strength

Reclaiming Motherhood

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Sabra Staudenmaier  PHOTO By Carolyn Simpson

As a small girl, I had big ideas about being a mom on Mother’s Day.  The day would begin with breakfast served to me in bed by little ones in matching pajamas. We would cuddle together as I opened crafty gifts and read homemade cards. We would spend the day enjoying the beauty of our bond. It would be the best day of the year. A celebration of togetherness.

When I became a mom and Mother’s Day came around, a celebration was the last thing on my mind. What was there to celebrate? The never-ending pile of laundry I faced daily? The ever-present crumbs on the floor of my car? Yes, I loved my kids. But motherhood,  at least my motherhood, not so much. Reality came with a mess in the kitchen from breakfast preparation. There was glitter all over my bed from the home-made cards. Even more work that I didn’t want to be doing. What I wanted on Mother’s Day was a break from it all. I was trying to survive; I didn’t have the energy to celebrate. 

Before becoming a mom, I saw the role as a powerful place to be. I saw the mother as the leader of the home, loved and respected for her guidance. After a decade and a half, I was experiencing the opposite of this. I felt disempowered. How could I be strong doing something that was so draining? A 24- hour, seven days a week job with no vacation. Three kids taking turns having meltdowns and making messes all over the place. I didn’t need to celebrate motherhood, I needed to be rescued from it. 

What was happening? 

I was teetering on the edge of burnout. I had been so focused on my role as a mom that   I stopped taking care of myself. I thought that a good mom was one who sacrifices herself for her family. All I needed was for my kids to be ok and that would somehow make everything else, including me, ok. I was clearly doing something wrong. I could feel my foundation crumbling. 

The problem wasn’t motherhood, it was the way I was doing it. I was looking at it from the top down. It was like I was building a building starting at the penthouse floor when I needed to start at the foundation. I was the foundation.

I knew something had to change. The quality of my life depended on it. I had to start taking better care of myself. Once I understood this, I was able to rebuild my motherhood by strengthening myself.

The first step I took was I started lifting weights three to five times each week.  I became physically strong, and physical strength set me on the right track. My mood improved. From there, my entire motherhood fell into line. I became the manager of my house, delegating housework rather than doing it all. I took control of my finances. I built new skills. I rested and recovered as needed. 

And then what happened? My motherhood experience transformed from one of disempowerment to one of strength. When I felt physically strong, I felt capable. Every aspect of my life began to bloom. I was in a role I didn’t need to escape from, not even for one day.

Motherhood is a big job, and the circumstances continue to change. While old issues remain new ones, like managing technology, social media and Covid, accrue. I have discovered that having an amazing family and home isn’t enough. It all must be managed in a way that isn’t depleting and exhausting.

This Mother’s Day, look at where you are on your journey. Do you want to celebrate motherhood or escape from it? 

If your experience is the one you’ve dreamed of, fantastic. If it isn’t then it’s time to make some changes. I invite you to join me for my podcast Banishing Mom Burnout. This is a podcast dedicated to getting moms out of depletion and into a position of strength and power. There is a way to reclaim motherhood. If I did it, so can you. Now, that’s something to celebrate!

Spotlight on Adina Olan-Ellick: Owner of Breathe, a Yoga and Pilates Studio in the Heart of Chappaqua

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It was a chance encounter on a cruise ship that ultimately steered Adina Olan-Ellick on a new career path. Adina, owner of the newly relocated Breathe, a yoga and Pilates studio in downtown Chappaqua was on a family vacation for a relative’s birthday and by the time she embarked on the ship all of the exercise classes were filled up. “The only thing left to sign up for was Pilates, so we did it every day,” she recalls. Adina, an almost 25-year resident of Chappaqua had always been athletic and was more of a self-proclaimed cardio addict. “I ran, did cardio kickboxing, aerobics, you name it,” she says during our interview on a chilly afternoon just steps away from her sunlight-filled studio in the heart of Chappaqua.

A Passion for Pilates

Something about Pilates and the mind/body connection coupled with the intentional movements resonated with her. Upon returning to Chappaqua she hired a private Pilates instructor to teach her at home before her three young children woke up and before her commute to her cardboard converting company in Long Island City. That private instructor, sensing Adina’s passion for the exercise encouraged her to pursue Pilates certification. She did taking weekend classes from beginner mat certification all the way through advanced system which took several years. She also trained with renowned physical therapist Dr. Abby Ellsworth in Scarsdale, author of seminal books on Pilates instruction, yoga and physical therapy. It wasn’t easy while maintaining a full-time job with young kids but Adina likes to “have a lot on her plate.”

Her job at the cardboard warehouse and in a male-dominated field entailed a lot of interaction with factory workers which was challenging. A hair-raising incident at work though convinced her that long-term her career there wasn’t sustainable and downright dangerous. “I was six months pregnant with my younger daughter and it was pay day and I had a lot of cash on me,” she recounts. Two men tried to steal her bag. Adina’s quick-thinking saved her as she hid under a truck until help arrived.

“They never got the cash,” she laughs later in the interview and I can’t help but wonder if her strength, flexibility and quick reaction time may be attributed to her Pilates practice.

Changing Careers

Flash forward a couple of years later and Adina was asked to participate in a Pilates DVD with Ellsworth. The filming took place over several days. “It was the first time that I was alone in a hotel room by myself and had time to really think.” She finally had her true a-ha moment and called her husband, an insurance and commercial lawyer and asked for his help in closing her business. She wanted to pursue Pilates instruction full-time and spend more time with her family.

She initially started teaching part-time in Scarsdale with Ellsworth but decided to ask for a job at the Pilates Center of Westchester, the former Breathe location. Adina asked the owner to give her a try. She was reluctant at first but she begged her for a Sunday morning class and then Adina ultimately asked her friends to participate.

After teaching there for many years, the former studio owner decided move to Arizona. Adina bought the studio a decade ago changing its name to Breathe, adding yoga classes following advice from her yoga-loving husband.

Knowledgeable Instructors: A Hallmark of Breathe

Adina has always prided herself on hiring highly knowledgeable instructors who have a strong sense of anatomy. “I have clients that had very low flexibility when they came here and now they can function pain-free in their daily lives. This method works.”

Both Pilates and yoga are forms of exercise with no age limits. Breathe even has a 92-year-old client. “A lot of people come to the studio after an injury or in conjunction with physical therapy,” explains Adina. Her old studio was up a flight of stairs so when the now defunct Hall of Scoops spot became available, she leased it.

The new studio features almost 40 Pilates and yoga classes a week, fitness apparel, grab-and-go food items from Rye Ridge’s Organic Pharmer plus F-factor, a fiber-based diet program.

“Sometimes a client will say they tried Pilates at their gym and got hurt. I wonder how can an instructor watch your form with 50 students in a mat class?” asks Adina. That is why she limits Pilates tower classes to seven students.

On the Horizon

And it’s that personalized attention that have earned the studio praise. “I’ve seen Chappaqua have its ups and downs,” she observes but with the new streetscape and additional retailers opening up recently, she hopes it is on an upswing. In addition to offering private yoga lessons, tower workshops and outdoor seating, Adina hopes to foster a sense of community at Breathe. Her studio also offers Pilates certification for students who want to teach there in the future. With a loyal fan base at Breathe, that future certainly looks bright.

Breathe is located at 14 South Greeley Avenue. For additional information, visit yoga-pilates-chappaqua.com.

COR Performance: Training Kids for Athletics

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We often hear parents ask: “Could my son’s injury have been prevented with strength and agility training?” or “My daughter is an excellent athlete, clearly a D1 caliber, what do I need to ensure that competitive edge?”

The most pressing questions, however, revolve around the potential benefits of starting your child on training at an early age. And how young is ‘too young’ to start?

Meanwhile, both you and your child may have big dreams of one day of playing college sports, or even professionally, but some kids simply want to play high school sports and create lifelong health and wellness habits.

Until recently, the standard approach to train young athletes would lead only to damage to the spine, stunt growth and/or ultimately result in injuries. Many even believed that strength training for kids results in slowed progression of athletic development.

All of this is true and false depending on how, what, when and why you are training.

Today, thanks to new research and practical knowledge, we better understand the biomechanics and the role it plays in all stages of a child’s life. We know for certain that a safe and age appropriate approach to athletics can be EXTREMELY beneficial to children in the long run.

Children who participate in a regular fitness routine or lifestyle tend to be a step ahead, developmentally speaking, of those that do not–in height, weight management, muscle strength, lung capacity, even body control, as well as self-confidence. Studies have also found a resistance training program can also have a great impact on strength prior to adolescence. With the proper trainer and program, preadolescents can attain the same levels of strength gains that their adolescent counterparts do, regardless of gender.

The Mayo Clinic, an authority in health research, has stated that kids should start age-appropriate strength and athletic development training as early as 7 or 8 years of age. At these early ages, you can expect a longer positive effect on a child than just playing sports.

If we invest the time to properly teach, train and develop our children now, we are maximizing their chances of long-term physical, mental and developmental success. As puberty, competition and challenge come into play, your child’s mind and body will be prepared. Call 914-273-3413 now to get your little athlete training!

COR Performance (CP) is a 16,000-square-foot facility located in Armonk, NY, featuring an indoor turf, fully equipped gym and onsite sports medical personnel. At CP, we focus on the four pillars of strength training: Strength, Mobility, Power, and Agility. We know what it takes to be reach optimum performance: Hard Work, Positive Attitude, and a Burning Desire to be the Best. CP trains; young athletes, amateurs, as well as professional athletes.