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courage

Our Volunteer Firefighters – Tradition, Sacrifice, and Rewards

February 22, 2020 by Ella Ilan

PHOTOS BY DONNA MUELLER

While we sleep soundly in the night, pagers go off and rouse the best and bravest amongst us. Answering the call of the horn, whether at 3 a.m. or 3 p.m., our volunteer firefighters step away from their daily lives to help their fellow citizens.

“I don’t think I’ve ever encountered someone on an emergency call that wasn’t happy to see us,” says Briarcliff Volunteer Fire Department First Assistant Chief Vincent Caruso, a 13-year member of the Briarcliff Fire Department. “It’s a great feeling when people see you and feel that help is here.”

Driven to Serve the Community

The Briarcliff Fire Department, The Ossining Fire Department, and The Pleasantville Fire Department are all 100% volunteer.

For some members, it’s in their blood and they are following in the footsteps of fathers and grandfathers.

“It’s our family tradition,” says Ossining Firefighter Rob Reaman of Rescue 14. “My grandfather was an ex-captain out of Chappaqua out of The J.I.D. [Bristol Engine Company], my uncle was an ex-captain out of Columbia Hose [Company] in Sleepy Hollow, my mom was president of Rescue 14 in Ossining, my father pretty much served everything and was in Cataract Hose [Company] for 28 years on Waller Avenue and then came back to Rescue 14 for about seven years now.”

Pleasantville Fire Chief Stephane Zapletal always had an interest in the fire department and joined as a teenager 19 years ago. “I’m a first generation firefighter but my wife’s family has four generations of firefighters and she’s the captain of the Pleasantville Ambulance Corps.”

Some members join after serving in a junior firefighter program during high school and others decide later in life that they want to give back to the community in this way.

Briarcliff’s Chief Caruso began his career working on the Volunteer Ambulance in high school. Finding it to be both noble and exciting work, he joined the Briarcliff Fire Department ambulance in 2006. “I planned on just riding as an EMT but soon found that I can be a fireman too. I did the training, got bit by the fire bug, worked my way up and it’s been a pleasure leading the group.”

Briarcliff’s Second Assistant Chief Arie Uyterlinde joined eleven years ago. After participating in a new employee orientation at Montefiore Medical Center geared towards caregivers, he was struck by the value of what these caregivers were delivering to patients. “As a corporate employee, this appealed to me and I wanted to contribute and have a positive impact on people’s lives. I saw signs up for volunteers just at the right time and decided to join. It’s really been a life changing experience.”

Pleasantville Fire Commissioner Dan Cultice joined in his forties. “I have a business in town and I wanted to give back to the community. It’s been very rewarding.”

The Challenge of Recruitment

All three departments struggle with the need for more volunteers. These departments were started when this area consisted of a primarily blue-collar population. This meant people stayed locally for work and were thus far more available to respond to calls than they are today. “With a good deal of our residents commuting to work in the city and not getting back until the evening, it can take double the number of members to cover the same amount of calls as it took when residents worked locally,” says Uyterlinde. “We need more members to ensure adequate coverage.”

“Anyone, no matter where you are, if you’re interested, go out and find your local fire department or EMS,” implores Caruso. “I don’t care where you live–I guarantee they need volunteers.”

“We will welcome and train anybody,” says Cultice. “I’m proud of our diversity. It’s a real melting pot. We have financial analysts from Wall Street, creative directors, architects, and blue-collar workers. We have men and women. It doesn’t matter if you don’t traditionally work with your hands.”

What It Takes

Interested candidates must be 18 years of age, have a clean record, and live or work in or near the town for which they volunteer. Recruits are trained in-house in the ways their particular department functions. Westchester County provides more substantial training that is required of all interior firefighters through the “Firefighter 1” training program at the Fire Training Center located in Valhalla. Interior firefighters can go into a burning building to extinguish fires or rescue victims. Some volunteers choose to help out as exterior firefighters whereas they can help out at the scene of an event but not go inside a burning building.

Firefighters undergo annual health screenings and occasionally physicians will limit someone’s active ability.

“Generally, people understand their own limitations and may dial back their functions on their own, if necessary,” says Uyterlinde. “Older members sometimes grow into more of a mentor role as opposed to a doer themselves. There’s a real tradition of having a lot of respect for your senior members because of the experience they bring to the table.”

“We have more than a handful of guys, each with 50 plus years of experience, and I regularly go to them for advice,” says Pleasantville’s Chief Zapletal.

Fearless Firefighters

All of the firefighters interviewed explained that they generally felt excited, rather than scared, upon getting a call. “You definitely get an adrenaline rush because it’s your job to start thinking ahead about what could be happening, what tools you’ll need, and what team you have that showed up at the fire house,” says Cultice. “We have a short amount of time to make the right decisions but we’re not scared because we’re well-trained and you know the firefighter next to you is going to have your back.”

Unforgettable Moments

Many of the departments’ calls leave indelible images in the firefighters’ minds that they cannot reveal to the public, because sharing them would be insensitive to the victims involved.

The interesting ones, however, are fun to share. Uyterlinde recalls a Christmas eve call where the police and fire department were called to investigate a self-combusting package. A package that had been received a week earlier and had been sitting on a living room floor started smoking. The homeowner brought it outside where it proceeded to catch fire. Although firefighters expected to find a battery or explosive within the package, it merely contained a purse. The Cause and Origin team reconstructed the scene and determined that sunlight coming through a window was concentrated by a snow globe that had been moved near the package onto a small piece of the box. This burned a hole through the box, caught the paper packaging inside the box on fire, and then proceeded to burn from inside the box out.

Zapletal recalls a fire where the hose supplying water was laid across the road and a car ran over it, bursting the hose and causing the water pressure to rip the hood off the car.

Relating some of his more enjoyable memories, Cultice recounts what it’s like to be one of the moms and dads running into the high school as a firefighter when an alarm goes off in one of the chemistry classes. “It’s always memorable when you see people in the community,” he says.

A Continuing Legacy

Each of the fire departments has a true appreciation for its history.

The Ossining Fire Department’s history stretches back farthest. As Westchester County’s first volunteer fire company, Washington Engine company was organized in Sing Sing in 1812. They purchased a gooseneck hand engine originally owned by the first organized fire company of New York City known as Engine No. 1. Today, the department boasts nine companies that operate six Engines, two Ladders, one Rescue Truck, one R.I.T. Truck, and one Spill Response Trailer. These nine companies were gradually added over the years to keep up with the growing population.

The Pleasantville Fire Department celebrated their 125th anniversary last year with a big party. When William H. Jahne organized the Pleasantville fire department in 1894, there were no streets, paved roads, municipal water, or sewer. The members used buckets of water to extinguish fires. Today, Pleasantville has four senior companies, a junior corps, and an auxiliary.

Just a few years later, in 1901, Frederick Messinger and a group of 13 other local men founded Briarcliff Steamer Company No.1. Briarcliff Steamer Company is no longer in existence, but there are currently three active companies; Briarcliff Fire Engine Company, Briarcliff Fire Hook and Ladder Company, and Scarborough Engine Company, which was formed to improve fire protection in the west part of the village.

As a nod to their storied history, Briarcliff is one of the only departments in the area that runs white apparatus, as opposed to red. The trucks are white to memorialize the white horse-drawn dairy carts donated by Walter Law, the “Laird of Briarcliff Manor,” who owned a large portion of this area, to be used as fire apparatus.

Proudly affixed to the Briarcliff fire trucks are the antique bells that are handed down from truck to truck. Ensuring that the legacy lives on, every time they buy a new truck, the department makes sure to specify a custom mount to hold a 100-year old bell.

Neighboring Departments Support Each Other

“We have a great relationship with our surrounding volunteer departments,” says Cultice. “If there is a large incident, we will ask other departments to join us. We will provide back up to our neighboring departments at a fire or go to their firehouse in case they get another call. We work together, train together and invite them to our firehouse for large events. I’m very proud of that kind of organization and camaraderie.”

For more information or to volunteer, please head to the fire department’s websites. For Briarcliff, go to www.bmfd.org. For Ossining, go to www.ossiningfire.org. For Pleasantville, go to www.pleasantvillefire.org.

Filed Under: Cover Stories Tagged With: 100% Volunteer, Answering the Call, Briarcliff Fire Department, courage, diversity, Fellow Citizens, help, Ossining Fire Department, Pleasantville Fire Department, Tradition, Volunteer Firefighters

A Gutsy Grand Finale

December 20, 2019 by Inside Press

During a final stop on a book tour promoting “The Book of Gutsy Women: Favorite Stories of Courage and Resilience” (Simon and Schuster), Hillary Clinton and Chelsea Clinton–in a discussion moderated by Vanessa Williams–addressed everything from Donald Trump’s impeachment to the role faith plays in their lives to several of the role models their co-authored book  portrays. 

Story/Photos by Grace Bennett

Pleasantville, NY, December 18–Excitement at Pace University was palpable both inside the sprawling Goldstein Fitness sports arena and afterwards too when staff and volunteers from both Pace and the Chappaqua Library (from where the event had been moved following a weather-related cancellation to the library weeks earlier) were all smiles helping attendees, from groups of Pace University students to hundreds of Westchester residents, pick up their copies of Secretary Hillary Rodham Clinton and Chelsea Clinton’s ‘Book of Gutsy Women.’ 

Chelsea Clinton, Secretary Hillary Rodham Clinton and Vanessa Williams

Before introducing Vanessa Williams to the stage to moderate a discussion with Hillary Clinton and Chelsea Clinton, Pace University President Marvin Krislov, noted that Pace has been co-educational since its founding 100 years ago. “We’ve educated many gutsy women of our own,” he noted, mentioning a host of Pace graduates and impressive ‘firsts’ including: Lillian F. Anstie and Charlotte Osann, among the first women to pass the CPA exam in New York;  Florentine Goodrich, appointed first treasurer of the Tennessee Valley Authority; Dr. Susan Merritt, founding dean of Pace’s Seidenberg School of Computer Science and Information Systems; and state Senate Majority Leader Andrea Stewart-Cousins—with two degrees from Pace: the first person of color, and the first woman, to lead a legislative chamber in New York. His final mention, to much applause, was of recent Pace grad Sydney Mesher, “who was born without a left hand, and became the first-ever Radio City Rockette with a visible disability.”

Krislov then invited everyone to welcome Vanessa Williams, “a multi-platinum recording artist… a star of television, film and the Broadway stage, and a lifelong resident of Westchester County.”

Vanessa Williams described The Book of Gutsy Women as Hillary and Chelsea’s portrayal of more than 100 women (103, it was later noted) who have inspired them throughout their lives (Chelsea described the challenge for she and her mom to pare the book down from at least 200 women they had hoped to include).

“They are fascinating profiles and also a playbook for anyone looking for courage… for their own gutsy life,” said Williams. “It is full of personal reflection filled with anecdotes from a mother and a daughter from two different generations but who share a lot in common.”

She introduced Chelsea as “a champion for girls and women, advocacy, writing, and work at the Clinton Foundation, and adjunct assistant professor at Columbia University’s Mailman School of Public Health.” She introduced Hillary as “the first woman in U.S. history to history to become a major party’s presidential nominee,” also outlining her key roles in public service, and her roles as “also a wife, mother and proud grandmother.”

After that, reading the audience correctly on the night of historic deliberations, Vanessa Williams launched into a question about the impending impeachment of Donald Trump.

Vanessa Williams: “…What do you think is going to happen to Donald Trump?”

Hillary Clinton: “Well, let’s just jump right in!”

Volunteers and staff at Pace University and the Barnes and Noble Bookstore on Pace’s campus
Representing the Chappaqua Library and Scattered Books of Chappaqua

But first she thanked Pace University, the Chappaqua Library, “Pam (Pamela Thornton), who keeps the Library going”,  Scattered Books, “our local store in Chappaqua,” Barnes and Noble on the Pace campus-and Vanessa Williams: “She’s local, she’s Westchester, she’s Chappaqua… but talk about a gutsy woman!…”

And then it was on to the impeachment proceedings:

Hillary said: “I have to say I thought Nancy Pelosi did a really extraordinary job… of delivering a somber, deliberative debate about whether or not the impeachment clause in our Constitution should be applied to our current president…”

She explained that “way back in 1974, she had been on the staff that investigated President Nixon, and able to watch the debate that took place in the House Judiciary Committee then. One of the members of Congress, in particular, who summed up what was at stake was Barbara Jordan, and she delivered, one of the great speeches of the last 100 years. I remember being taken and moved by the seriousness by all the members of Congress to the point when the Judiciary committee voted and Republican House members had voted for at least one of the articles of impeachment, putting country over party..”

At another juncture, Hillary added that Senator Mitch McConnell will aim for an acquittal but also noted “that many in the polls are in favor of conviction…While I don’t think that’s likely with the current state of affairs at least it shows that the American people have really understood why this is such an important moment in our history.”

Throughout the book tour for The Book of Gutsy Women, Hillary and Chelsea shared memories of the women who had the most profound impact on their lives and life choices. Chelsea referred to Geraldine (Gerry) Ferraro, and her historic nomination as a first woman vice president on a Democrat ticket, and of her mom “taking me to see her…. getting all dressed up… and what a big moment that was.”

The mother/daughter co-authors discussed the big gap in women role models between their generations with Hillary noting that she “didn’t know any women who worked outside the home except for my teachers and librarians. I was constantly looking for other ideas of what women could do.” 

She described her upbringing as a typical post World War II experience in an outside of Chicago ‘hood.  Her mother, Hillary said, was “intent on opening my eyes and expanding my horizons.”

A popular comic book character of the day had made a huge impression on Hillary: Brenda Starr was amazing… she had this flaming red hair, she was an international correspondent who fell in love with the guy with the eye patch. It was so romantic, and exotic.”

Hillary mentioned other larger than life influences, including Anne Frank, Helen Keller… “women i met in the pages of Life magazine…,” she said.  “Not many women were held up as heroic figures in elementary school… maybe Joan of Arc and Queen Elizabeth.”

In stark contrast, she added, “most of Chelsea’s friends mothers worked… an interesting distinction.”

Chelsea referred to her pediatrician, a woman, and hardly the only women in her life who were powerful figures and role models.  “It was an entirely different world for me to grow up in.” 

At one point, Hillary Clinton asked Vanessa Williams, after referring to her as a “pathfinder” and “pioneer” who her own role model was. “Who did you look up to?”

“The support of my parents for sure,” Williams said, noting her mother’s presence (Helen Williams) in the audience too. “She told me you are going to have to do better than everyone else just to be considered equal.  I knew in a white environment, I had to be excellent… as a Girl Scout, in a marching band, choir, theater… I did all those things to be a multi-talented performer to allow me the skill set to achieve things.”

Williams also mentioned ‘trailblazers’ including Lena Horne and Diahann Carroll  “who I had the luxury of working with in my lifetime” and who had “opened the door” for her.

Next it was on to a discussion of the critical influence of faith in both Hillary and Chelsea’s lives.

Hillary: “Having faith that connects me to a larger world is an instrumental part of understanding who I am. It is a source of resilience to know that you can be knocked down, but you can get back up, to know that love is the most powerful force of the universe.”

She noted being lucky that her parents “set high expectations but were there for me unconditionally” and mentioned “ a great minister” who took me to see Martin Luther King, Jr. when i was in junior high school, opening my eyes and my mind in ways that i have never imagined.” Hillary said she linked that to her faith: “how you’re supposed to be, how you’re supposed to treat other people… it became major motivator in my life.”

“A lot of the women in the book are women who have been knocked down, marginalized, who have been criticized, beaten, sometimes brutally for what they believe, terribly assaulted, left to die, exiled, or been in prison. The common characteristic they hung on to is their faith, not just in faith in themselves…”  but more, she elaborated that they “were part of something bigger and greater than themselves…  “they were part of greater sense of possibility and hopefulness.”

“It’s hard to keep going in face of all sorts of challenges unless you can dig deep down and think I really have to do this because it really will help someone else because it really will make a difference.”

Chelsea tied a die-hard optimism she said she teaches her children to her own faith and emphasized that “optimism is a moral choice: you have to make a moral choice to be optimistic… that the forces of darkness I believe are relying on us to become exhausted, less optimistic and to lose our faith.”

“That connects me more to my faith, to my journey and gets my determination going to get up every day to do whatever I can for our world and for our shared community,” Chelsea said.

Both mother and daughter weighed in on the voter registration controversy in Georgia. Chelsea offered: “Stacey Abrams has been so gutsy and extraordinary in how she dealt with her I think illegitimate defeat but also with what she is building through her organization ‘Fair Fight Action’ to help ensure that the right to vote is protected in Georgia. Look at what she is doing and learn from what she’s doing and see if you can support her in Georgia and how to expand it outward and extend it throughout the country.”

The women in the book are not all political figures, but all historical figures who have made a difference, whether social activists, writers, Olympians…or scientists.

 Vanessa Williams asked about including astronaut Sally Rider in Gutsy Women, first commenting: “She started as a tennis player… before she was an astronaut. When asked why she decide to become a scientist, she answered: ‘a bad forehand.’”

Hillary explained that Sally Rider had been one of Chelsea’s heroes growing up, and that the Clintons had sent her to Space Camp as a young girl “because she was fascinated by space and astronauts. That was poignant to me because when President Kennedy had announced the Space program, I had written to Nassau, and asked how I can get to be an astronaut, and they wrote back: ‘Sorry we are not taking girls.’”

Chelsea, for her part, said that during the first time she met Sally Rider (at Space Camp graduation!), she “was so overwhelmed that I tripped over my own feet and fell in front of her… mortified, was 12 or 13, and turned a beet red, but she could not have been nicer to me.” But most importantly, Chelsea noted Riders advocacy for young girls in science, and Rider making efforts throughout her busy career to nurture that.

In the course of a little over an hour, the discussion ran the gamut, from the Howard Stern interview, the Tree of Life Synagogue shooting, and a defense of Title IX and health care. A handful of audience questions were posed including a nine year old boy’s question about their favorite baseball teams. Chelsea: The Eagles (“because marriage requires compromise”), and Hillary: the Yankees (because she’s a New Yorker now).

Grace Bennett, Publisher and Editor of the Inside Press, appreciates gutsy women, too.

 

 

Filed Under: Inside Westchester Tagged With: Book Tour, Chappaqua library, Chelsea Clinton, courage, Goldstein Fitness Arena, Gutsy, Hillary Clinton, Influence, Martin Krislov, Nancy Pelosi, Pace University, Resiliance, Role Models, Sally Rider, Stacey Abrams, The Book of Gutsy Women, Vanessa Williams, Westchester

Courage & Compassion in Times of Crisis: The Keys to Helping Yourself or Anyone You Know

August 29, 2018 by Geri Mariano

Full Disclosure: I was not an active follower of either Kate Spade or Anthony Bourdain. In this day and age of social media and celebrity, I certainly knew who both were and what each brought to the table, pun intended. I never purchased the eponymous bag that made Miss Spade a household name. I should have been quite a fan of Mr. Bourdain, but truth be told, watching his programs discouraged me in recent years. I was reminded of all I have lost since the first of three major surgeries left me even more mobility impaired than I had been for the first 42+ years of my life. Additional truth be told, I’m a fashionista wanna-be born in the wrong body and a frustrated hostess with the mostess not to mention a grounded adventurer.

The two recent high profile suicides early this summer raised the serious topic of depression once again. It takes the hard to believe self-inflicted deaths of the famous for this to be covered in the news with the exception of occasional reporting on teen suicide as well as the high suicide rate among veterans. The death of beloved Robin Williams highlighted the topic that still today seems taboo. The vast majority of his fans, knowing him only from the small or big screens making us laugh, found it unbelievable that he could be desperately unhappy, depressed. Do we really WANT to know that friends, family or celebrities can be feeling hopeless?

Many who have read my blogs or followed my Just Call Me Geri Facebook page probably know that my Mother (the one who chose me from a newspaper picture), from my earliest consciousness, taught me the importance of not feeling sorry for myself. The message included the tacit warning that no one would like me if I showed self-pity. It was only decades later that I would learn that there is a significant difference between whining and legitimately feeling down due to my circumstances.

By no means have I had the worst life, far from it, but I started life with strikes against me, first being born in a deformed shell with a condition called Diastrophic Dysplasia (some still call it dwarfism) that would embody my soul and personality. Being abandoned in the hospital by biological parents who left instructions behind that “no pictures to be taken of this baby” added 2nd and 3rd strikes, yet I was never out.

I won’t list the entire litany of hardships faced through 50 years but some include:

  • Being asked why I would want to have a baby and do to them what happened to me;
  • Being humiliated at a summer camp by someone supposedly to have been family;
  • Hearing sighs, groans and whispers when people had to help me in/out of cars or up stairs (who’s going to help Geri?”) and to stay away during emergencies;
  • Being “gently” told I could never provide a home for a man I had feelings for and not to expect to ever get married;
  • Being “harassed” by a married man who knew I would have little to no other intimate opportunities;
  • Being belittled and disrespected in hospital facilities when known I was alone;
  • Having inappropriate medical treatments or not having appropriate medical interventions due to Government restrictions;
  • Being at mercy of caregivers, who can be rude, rough and larcenous;
  • Being told I’m too depressing to talk to …

When at 40 I had finally obtained a Master’s Degree to begin a long in trying to figure out career, I was soon stymied, having that career cut short by three surgeries that left me in worse shape than before. The last two surgeries I never would have consented to if I had been warned my mobility would be all but lost completely. I would have opted for shorter life span over non quality of life. When over 10–30 years ago I’d fall into pits of despair, I struggled mightily, conjured up plans, fingering bottles of medication, really my only option. Remembering the haunting conclusion of Edith Wharton’s “Ethan Frome” always prevented me from trying anything self destructive with my car, the only other possible tool at my disposal. Yet, I always dug deep, as far inside as I could to keep the wavering flame from going out. Once such night in the wee hours, I remember sitting on the floor by my bed sobbing with heaving muted screams. What brought me back was thinking of “my kids” and their parents …how would they explain to them that I gave up?

This disclosure can possibly hurt my alternate career in the making …aiming to be a successful inspirational speaker but this is my truth. I cannot be phony. I’m not asking for people to feel sorry for me, but to understand that there are no easy answers.

More additional truth be told, I’d much rather laugh than cry. I actually enjoy having others laugh at my sometimes corny, other times bawdy, humor. I really should find an amateur Stand Up/Sit Down Comedy venue. Ridiculous irony from the universe, I’m rather an extrovert. God couldn’t have made me an agoraphobic?

I have my “highs” when I have several speaking engagements booked but then the “lows” (oxymoronic?) come rising up. (oxymoronic?) when I can’t seem to break through, catch that one break. My life is not one that made headlines because of a national crisis such as the Boston Marathon Bombing. I didn’t lose limbs while fighting for my Country. I didn’t grow up in

the age of social media where Promposals to kids with Special Needs go viral. I do not begrudge today’s kids who benefit from widespread inclusion.

I do not begrudge these later generations of kids who have benefited from widespread inclusion. In fact, I’d like to think I helped pave the way. Perhaps I have been “of use” to quote John Irving’s Dr. Larch.

Depression can take deep hold of anyone. For those suffering, suicide can seem like the only way out. Others may see it as selfish. Feeling like a burden is not easy but once a person has that initial thought, it becomes nearly impossible to erase it from one’s mindset. Please have compassion for those who have left via their own actions. And if you “can handle the truth,” reach out to those who may be struggling. When I encourage students to look after each other, I ask, “wouldn’t you want someone to look after you?” For those who are struggling, please try to let someone know you’re hurting, reach deep down inside and find the courage to reach out for assistance without shame. Keep your flame lit!

Filed Under: Et Cetera Tagged With: Anthony Bourdain, compassion, courage, depression, Geri Mariano, Helping, Just Call Me Geri, Kate Spade, life, suicide, Teen suicide

Courage Learned in Dance Extends to Many Life Arenas

October 21, 2015 by The Inside Press

Screenshot 2015-10-16 12.26.32

At Armonk Center for Dance, the teachers begin the feelings of courage and kindness that are present throughout the studio. The dancers continue these feelings by constantly encouraging each other, and striving to be better dancers. The studio operates with a non-competitive atmosphere allowing the dancers to express themselves and make lasting friendships. Students learn to dance and to have self-discipline, self-esteem, teamwork, and the confidence to stand in front of the classroom, the boardroom, and even the courtroom. www.armonkcenterfordance.com

Filed Under: Sponsor News! Tagged With: Armonk, Armonk Center for Dance, courage, Dance, Inside Press, theinsidepress.com

It Takes Courage

October 21, 2015 by The Inside Press

Beth Besen
Beth Besen

Ever stare at a blank piece of paper, or, in today’s terms, a blank screen, and wonder what to write? Trust me, it can be daunting! Perhaps it’s what inspired Ernest Hemingway to pen Courage is Grace under Pressure.

Seriously though, what is courage? And where is it found? It’s been described by many, and in many ways. Our cover story speaks to the courage one family found to move on after the untimely passing of their son and brother. They, their friends, his friends and the greater Armonk community remember and honor Jamie Love each year with a 5k run. Most of us are deeply fortunate in that we have not had to experience the nightmare that is the loss of a child. To come from that dark place to a wish for others to laugh and smile in Jamie’s honor is truly an act of courage as well as love.

Giving of ourselves is another way we show courage. While we are all familiar with the Golden Rule, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto to you,” it isn’t always easy to step up and make a difference in others’ lives. In simple Darwinian terms, we’re programmed to put ourselves first. Time is precious, and truly as big a gift as many other resources. Those who make time to volunteer are not only doing good deeds, but showing that they can put aside their atavistic me-first tendencies. Our story, Neighbors Feeding Neighbors in Body and Spirit, describes the many ways local lay individuals and clergy members make our world a better place.

On the other hand, there are those among us who find it quite hard to say “No”. Psychologically speaking, they’re called “people-pleasers”. In general, people pleasers want everyone around them to be happy and they also often crave others’ approval. It’s a perfect-storm way to over-schedule and under-care for oneself. Consider the upcoming Thanksgiving holiday. We love and look forward to it year after year; the traditions, the feast, the time off from work and school…and the chance to be with our friends and family. But, what if we’re not a Hallmark movie? What if we can’t house everyone or set a Martha Stewart table? Let’s have the courage to say “yes” to what we can do, and “no” to what we can’t. If you turn to When An Air Mattress Just Isn’t Enough, you’ll find we’ve gathered a list of great local lodging options that can help ease the strain of holiday hosting.

And speaking of Thanksgiving Traditions, make sure to read our fun piece on this very topic. Discover what some of your neighbors plan to do, maybe find an inspiration or two you’d like to try for yourselves! Chez moi, I know we’ll watch the parade in our PJs while cooking and setting up for the holiday dinner. I’m especially thankful to have my family coming to me this year, including one of my brothers, his children and his ex-wife! I admire their civility, and, yes, their courage in putting negative issues aside in order to celebrate the positive and make the holiday family-centric for all the children.

Election Day fast approaches. Do you know what positions are up for the vote in North Castle?

We offer a very helpful overview in They’re up for the Vote!; I highly recommend acquainting or re-acquainting yourself with the candidates. I’m volunteering to help at my polling place for the first time this year, and, I don’t mind sharing, I’m a bit anxious about it. I attended two evening workshops, but they both took place last summer. What if I can’t remember all the rules? Still, my sense of reason tells me I’ll be ok, that others with more experience will be available to help me and, more to our point about courage, that I owe myself the chance to prove myself as well as fulfill a great public service.

When we try something new, when we take that first step into the great unknown, we’re actually making the proverbial “leap of faith’. If you think about it, courage and faith actually walk hand in hand all the time. Psychotherapist Jodi Baretz describes the process in greater detail in “Life Begins at the End of your Comfort Zone.” And, back in September, my rabbi, Rabbi Jonathan Jaffe of Temple Beth El, delivered a very thought-provoking sermon on The Meaning of Faith; among the many takeaways, I share the following with you: Faith springs from the large gap between the two poles of certainty and absurdity…occurs when I am asked to act irreversibly upon only partial evidence…is not a matter of belief, as belief does not ask anything of me…is a matter of action, in which I am called to make a commitment based upon my convictions.

When Inside Press Publisher Grace Bennett approached me to help her launch this magazine, we knew each other very little and had only worked together once or twice previously. She took a leap of faith, as did I. And you, our readers and merchants, showed faith and courage too. You welcomed us and gave us the opportunity to become The Magazine for North Castle and Beyond. I’ll be stepping down as Executive Editor but will continue to contribute from time to time. So, this is not goodbye, but a fond farewell for now.

Happy Holidays, best wishes and, until the next time,

-Beth

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