Stacey Pfeffer, Author at Inside Chappaqua and Inside Armonk: The Magazines for New and North Castle

Dads, Grads & the Arts

June 1, 2018 by Stacey Pfeffer

As I write this column, it is pouring outside and the temperature is hovering at 60 degrees. It’s hard to believe that in ten days Memorial Day weekend will be here and the unofficial start of summer. As anyone in this part of Northern Westchester can attest, it has been a long, hard winter. And that’s why we wanted to celebrate summer (and dads and grads!) with our June issue.

We are fortunate enough to live in an area that is chock full of fun and culture during the summer. Fancy hearing the latest indie bands? Grab a spot at the Pleasantville Music Festival. Is chamber music more your thing? Head on over to nearby picturesque Caramoor. Want to see young thespians sing their hearts out? Take the kids and go see Annie at the Armonk Library.

For me, a backyard BBQ truly epitomizes summer and the best of living in the suburbs. Come Memorial Day weekend, I’m itching to get the grill going and I’ll be sure to visit many of the local farmers markets to pick up a few things–corn waiting to be slathered with butter, fresh fruit pies bursting with flavor and seafood that I’ll cook on my cedar plank. There’s a bounty of options for farmers market fans in our towns and nearby and I love taking the family there on a Saturday morning–our dog included! Not only do they offer an opportunity to connect with local farmers and purveyors but also provide a great way to socialize with your neighbors.

Speaking of neighbors, we wanted to highlight two dads in our community: John Berman, CNN anchorman of “New Day” and an Armonk resident who is always seeking the truth in his role as a journalist, and Ben Lieberman, a distracted driving awareness advocate who was recently honored with the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration’s Lifesavers Award for Public Service and a Chappaqua dad. They both give back to their communities in numerous ways and serve as role models. Happy Father’s Day to John, Ben and all the dads out there who give 110% of themselves everyday.

We also wanted to wish a congratulations to all the recent or soon-to-be grads out there. So whatever you are celebrating this month–dads, grads or the start of summer, here’s to enjoying every minute of it with your loved ones. Happy summer and see you in September.

Enjoy,

Stella Schwartz’s Rigorous Training for Division 1 at UMass

June 1, 2018 by Stacey Pfeffer

As Greeley athletes work on their summer fitness routines, graduating senior Stella Schwartz is prepping to play Division 1 soccer in the Atlantic 10 Conference at the University of Massachusetts at Amherst. The UMass Women’s Soccer pre-season starts July 31st. That’s when the team moves onto campus and starts to train and practice together. To prepare for pre-season, the coach sends all players a Summer Fitness Packet. The packet includes Strength Training which is lifting weights, Agility Training which is doing small running drills to work on speed and change of direction, Aerobic Training, which is running longer distances like 2 miles or 3 miles, usually within a certain timeframe and a Mobility Circuit, which is a stretching program. The Fitness Packet also includes a calendar that starts in May and goes through pre-season. Each day has a different drill.

Besides working on the UMass Fitness Packet every day, Schwartz trains with a technical coach (who she’s been working with for 4 years) who works with her on all aspects of the technical side of soccer, such as first touch, heading, shooting and body position. “Even though I just received the fitness packet in May, I had already started more serious training on my own last summer, to prepare for college soccer. Starting a training program a few weeks before pre-season camp will not prepare a player to be at their best,” notes Schwartz.

“The biggest difference in playing Division 1 soccer and club soccer is the speed of play and the physicality of the players,” explains Schwartz. “It’s a huge adjustment and can be overwhelming as a freshman.” So another way Schwartz is preparing for Division 1 level soccer this summer is to play with college players on the New York Surf U23 team. They’re a member in the United Women’s Soccer (UWS) summer league. The league is a place where current college players (and graduated college players) can stay on the ball and compete while on summer break. It’s also a place for players to be seen by college coaches if they want to transfer schools or to play at the national level. The team is made up of college players, International players and National players. “It’s a great environment for me to be in because it pushes me to work on areas I need to improve.” Schwartz’s goal is to go into pre-season camp fit, strong and prepared. And it sounds like she’ll be doing just that!

From Windmill to the Great White Way…

April 21, 2018 by Stacey Pfeffer

Armonk Native Bonnie Gleicher’s New Children’s Musical Addy and Uno Captures Audience’s Hearts

“I actually sang before I spoke,” reminisces 29-year old former Windmill resident Bonnie Gleicher, who wrote the music and lyrics for the children’s off-Broadway show Addy and Uno currently playing at The Kirk Theater on West 42nd Street. The family musical featuring a colorful cast of characters represented by puppets touches on themes such as disability, kindness, bullying and friendship.

One of the main characters “Uno”, a math whiz, is entered in a math competition but fears being on stage due to his autism. But his friends with other disabilities ranging from ADHD to mobile impairment help him overcome taunting from the school bullies and ultimately succeed in the end. There are themes any grade schooler can relate to resulting in a heartfelt musical with soaring tunes that is sure to leave audience members smiling and cheering for “Uno.”

A Love for Theater at an Early Age

Music was a big part of Gleicher’s life from a young age. She recalls as a toddler prancing around her house, pretending to be “Ariel” from The Little Mermaid. As an elementary school student in Armonk, Gleicher landed the lead roles in both Peter Pan and The Wiz of Oz. She soon yearned to audition for roles in the city and the talented Gleicher was cast as the orphan “Kate” and the understudy for Annie in the Broadway national tour of Annie as a 10-year old and then as “Young Jane” in the Broadway musical Jane Eyre when she was 12.

Gleicher is thankful for her supportive parents, Teri and Kenny Gleicher, who still live in Windmill and helped her achieve her dreams. “Growing up, my mom drove me in and out of the city along the West Side Highway to audition and perform in New York. She never pushed me to do any of this. She basically saw I was living my dream and sacrificed a lot by touring the country with me in Annie for eight months while my dad and grandmother helped raise my sister. “

Gleicher took a hiatus in high school from performing in the city and instead focused on her schoolwork while continuing to take piano lessons at home. “It basically took two years until my piano teacher told my parents that they were wasting their money,” Gleicher says with a chuckle.

Instead of practicing Chopin, Gleicher was writing songs. She stopped piano and began to focus on songwriting more seriously. She still did a few talent shows and open mic nights at Byram Hills High School but stayed out of the limelight. Gleicher recalls how her social studies teacher Matt Allen was always supportive of her and they still keep in touch today.

Meeting at Decca Records: A Defining Moment

And go places she did. A journalism student and Phil Beta Kappa graduate of the University of Wisconsin at Madison, Gleicher was lucky enough to have one of her demos heard by an executive at Decca Records as an undergraduate. “He told me this all sounds great to me, but I hear theater in it.” It was a defining moment for Gleicher. “I thought to myself, oh my God. That makes so much sense. That brings everything that I’ve ever done together.” And so Gleicher wrote her first full-length musical in her senior year of college and has continued writing ever since.

The Addy and Uno show was conceptualized by Dr. Nava R. Stilton, a developmental psychologist who wrote the Realabilities Educational Comic Book Series. The series was developed so that individuals with disabilities can see themselves represented positively on-screen, and typical children and adults can become increasingly knowledgeable, sensitive and interested in their peers with disabilities. Gleicher met Stilton through a mutual friend and Gleicher was so excited about it that she knew she had to write the music and lyrics.

The Show’s Short Timeline

Gleicher describes the writing process as “euphoric” and “seeing the impact the show has had on audiences is incredible. While writing the music, I knew it had to feel fun and playful and comical, while revealing the characters’ disabilities in a way that was sensitive and touching.” The day after meeting Dr. Stilton she wrote Uno’s anthem “Brave” and was able to complete all the music within a month.

The show was first performed at the 14 Street Y downtown and then went to Off-Broadway within a year and a half which is a very short timeframe, notes Gleicher. Most shows take 5-7 years until they come to fruition. Gleicher credits the producing team of Tom and Michael D’Angora of making the show more interactive and improving the dialogue before the production moved to off-Broadway.

“Writing musicals is such an investment in every way. There are so many up and downs with doing what you love but it is really satisfying when you get to see the impact this show has on people,” comments Gleicher. “There are a lot of shows that the world wants but not what the world needs. Addy and Uno is a story that the world needs.”

The Future for Gleicher

Up next, Gleicher is writing an original family musical called Little Things. Gleicher who previously lived above a children’s playground in the city, used to love listening to the children at recess. “It is such a beautiful sound and I thought how can I capture that in a musical. It’s about children tasting freedom and going up against a tyrranical principal.” The show is currently being produced by the New York Theatre Barn and NYU Tisch’s Graduate Musical Theatre Writing program.

Addy and Uno will be performed at Gleicher’s alma mater Wampus Elementary School on May 15 and Gleicher will be in attendance. So what would Gleicher say to any aspiring songwriters or thespians in the audience? “If you love what you do, you believe it’s your purpose, and your intentions are pure, you will live your dreams.”

My Sisters’ Place: A Haven for Hope and Help

April 21, 2018 by Stacey Pfeffer

(L-R): Danielle DiNapoli, Karen Cheeks-Lomax and Gabriella Ibacache

A Not for Profit Providing Local Support to Victims of Domestic Violence & Human Trafficking

It’s a non-descript building in downtown White Plains steps from the Metro-North station but for people served by the non-profit My Sisters’ Place (MSP), it is a beacon of hope. It is a safe haven where victims of domestic violence (DV) and human trafficking can finally begin to change their lives.

Founded more than 40 years ago, MSP offers residential, support and legal services for victims of abuse and trafficking. The non-profit also offers educational and preventative programs for students in middle school and high school. In addition, MSP advocates for legislation protecting victims and provides training for healthcare professionals and law enforcement personnel. In short, MSP is a comprehensive agency that provides direct services, legislative advocacy, and prevention education to 15,000 people a year in Westchester County.

Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women in the US and up to 10 million children witness some form of domestic violence annually.¹ Although 84% of the victims of abuse and human trafficking that MSP helped last year were female, they also provide services to a small percentage of men or transgender individuals. Last year MSP provided counseling to 130 children and emergency housing for more than 175 adults and children at two confidential full-service shelters located in Westchester.

Battling Misconceptions

There is a misconception that both domestic violence and human trafficking don’t happen in affluent communities but these problems cut across socioeconomic levels, notes Karen Cheeks-Lomax, the CEO of MSP. When they do happen in affluent communities, they are widely sensationalized in the media such as the brutal stabbing of Scarsdale pediatrician, Dr. Robin Goldman, by her husband Jules Reich, a well-respected tax attorney, and a human trafficking and sex slave ring discovered in Pound Ridge-based author Joseph Yannai’s basement.

Judy Dobles, a Chappaqua-based volunteer for the past six years with MSP, knows all too well that domestic violence doesn’t discriminate. As a volunteer in the ‘Sisters in Law’ program, she has accompanied MSP clients to court, solely for the purpose of supporting the victim as much as possible.

“Whether that’s talking or just sitting quietly by their side, if they don’t want to talk, shielding them from having to see their abuser before going in to the courtroom, and basically just trying to keep them as calm as possible before they have to go in before the judge,” explains Dobles. She recalls one of her first “accompaniments” with a very educated, successful client who had had a lucrative career and came from an affluent background. “It was difficult to connect that information with the broken person I saw before me.”

Still Dobles finds this type of volunteerism rewarding. “It’s rewarding when a client walks into a courtroom or magistrate’s room and can answer questions calmly and succinctly. It’s really rewarding when they exit the room with a smile because they feel like they are being heard and they’re not alone. Also, as a huggy/feely person myself, I would say that 99% of the time, my clients and I hug goodbye–and I feel truly honored to get those hugs.”

Expanding the Definition of Domestic Violence

“Domestic violence doesn’t fit in a box,” notes Cheeks-Lomax. Danielle DiNapoli, a community educator in MSP’s Domestic Violence Education and Prevention (DVEP) program which educates more than 5,000 middle and high school students a year. She explains that it is “not just physical abuse. It is an intentional pattern of behaviors where one person is gaining and maintaining control over another. It can be financial, mental, cyber or spiritual/cultural abuse.”

DiNapoli also teaches the students about warning signs in a relationship that may lead to abuse further down the road. Extreme possessiveness, jealousy, isolating the victim from family/friends or checking in at the person’s place of work or showing up at social outings to which they are not invited are all potential warning signs. It can also be verbal abuse such as putting a partner down or controlling what they eat or wear.

For high school students, DiNapoli states that 1 in 3 have been involved in an abusive relationship.² They may feel particularly afraid to discuss it with an adult because their parents, she points out, might not even know about the relationship or forbid dating. Gabriella Ibacache, a children’s counselor at MVP points out that the abuse may start off as very small or subtle and the abuser may manipulate their partner by apologizing or buying them gifts.

DiNapoli wants students to understand that the power and control that we see in society can trickle down into our relationships. “By the time I’m seeing them [the kids may be 11 or 12 years old], and this is the first time that they are talking about these issues, and that’s a real problem. We need to be teaching kids how they should be treated and treat one another at a much earlier age,” explained DiNapoli.

Safety Planning

When DiNapoli talks to high school students, MSP provides survivor stories and they discuss warning signs, what type of abuse the survivor endured and reasons why the survivor did not leave. “A lot of the kids ask, ‘why didn’t the victim just leave?’ People tend to shame and blame the victim for not leaving,” said DiNapoli. But on average, DiNapoli says it takes the victim seven attempts before she leaves permanently. And when the victim does decide to leave for good, it is the most dangerous time for that person. They could be seriously harmed or killed. “So much of what we do at MSP is “safety plan” –figuring out the safest way to leave, and that’s not the same for every person, and can change daily due to new salient factors,” explains Cheeks-Lomax.

Ibacache notes that the barriers to leaving can still be just as hard even when the victim is affluent. When children are in the mix, the danger increases significantly warns Ibacache.

Human Trafficking: It Does Happen Here

For more than a decade, MSP has been helping victims of human trafficking and last year helped 85 survivors of human trafficking. In New York State, there were 942 victims identified by social service providers and law enforcement in 2016. Of the victims, 82% were for sex trafficking purposes and 18% were for labor trafficking with 27% of the victims being minors. 43% are citizens from other countries and 57% are residents of New York from outside the five boroughs.³

Housing, Public Transportation & Immigration Status: A Trifecta of Issues for Many MSP Clients

Although MSP has 60 employees and is a $6 million agency (with $1.6 million from private donors), Cheeks-Lomax notes that they are working in a sector that is very challenging. There are challenges that are unique to Westchester County such as a lack of affordable or low-income housing and public transportation for clients.

Imagine if you need to push a baby carriage to get here, notes Cheeks-Lomax. “If you don’t have safe housing, you can’t do much,” laments Cheeks-Lomax. MSP recently won a conditional award to work with Westhab, the largest developer of affordable and low-income housing in the county, and hopes to partner with them to create 17 two-bedroom apartments for MSP clients in the near future.

“Immigration status is also a huge issue. In 2009, Westchester County was not reimbursing immigrant populations at MSP. We briefed the issue as to who should be served by these federal dollars. We took it all the way up to the governor. If people couldn’t come to us, we argued that they would end up at a hospital or a drug rehab. Every single county now in New York State provides services to immigrant victims of DV and human trafficking,” Cheeks-Lomax explains triumphantly.

Looking Ahead

Cheeks-Lomax is hopeful that the #metoo movement will highlight the power dynamic that is present in domestic violence cases and raise awareness about it. “There are the same fundamentals of fear and intimidation intersecting. For us, it proves a point. It is always about power and control and the abuser does it because he/she can.” She is also looking forward to working with County Executive George Latimer, and believes MSP will make some good headway with his administration.

1. Source: dvrc-or.org
2. Source: loverespect.org
3. Source: NYS Office of Temporary and Disability Assistance Refugee Services

6 Critical Life Messages to Help a Friend

If you believe a friend is in an abusive situation, these are the ‘messages’ that the staff at My Sisters’ Place say she or he needs to hear. “It is important not to “revictimize” the person who has been abused,” notes Cheeks-Lomax. All of these messages validate the person’s experience instead of shaming or blaming the victim.

I believe in you.
I trust you.
I know you can handle it.
You are listened to.
You are cared for.
You are very important to me.

Source: My Sisters’ Place Domestic Violence Education and Prevention Program

Joyful Living: Armonk

April 21, 2018 by Stacey Pfeffer

“Joyful living” – two simple words that sum up this month’s theme of the magazine just in time for Mother’s Day. It should be easy enough to achieve. After all, we live in one of the most beautiful parts of Westchester County. But honestly, I’ve been having a hard time lately embracing “joyful living” with this never ending winter. I’ve tried to trick myself by thinking that spring is on the horizon. I’ve painted my toes a lovely shade of pastel pink. I’ve done a thorough spring cleaning in my house but still Mother Nature refuses to cooperate.

Nevertheless, I wanted to highlight six facts I learned while putting together this issue that made me smile and will likely make you appreciate living in North Castle.

1. Once upon a time there was a little girl named Bonnie Gleicher living in the Windmill community. Gleicher loved theater and had leading roles in her school plays. As a young girl, she was “young Jane” in Jane Eyre on Broadway and played an orphan in the Broadway national tour of Annie. Fast forward seventeen years, and Gleicher composed the music and lyrics for Addy and Uno–a family musical about disabilities and friendship featuring a colorful cast of puppets that is currently playing off-Broadway. There’s definitely more to come from this talented composer.

2. Danny McManus is a fifth-grader at Wampus Elementary School living with leukemia. Nine of his friends voluntarily shaved their heads to raise money for leukemia research. There’s no doubt that Danny has a strong support network here and friends who are willing to go the extra mile. From his teacher Mrs. Marchesini who has put together videos for him from his classmates to fellow churchgoers at St. Patrick’s, the McManuses have a community who truly cares about Danny’s recovery.

3. Students in the Dr. Robert Pavlica Authentic Science Program at Byram Hills High School are lucky to have educator Stephanie Greenwald at the helm as the program director. She’s passionate about her job and calls it “the absolute best job I ever had.” Read our up close and personal article on her and you’ll see why the students in the program garner numerous awards and accolades from the most prestigious science programs.

4. Speaking of accolades, The Armonk Chamber of Commerce is gearing up for their Citizen of the Year event this month at the Whippoorwill Club on May 15th. Big congratst to Judy Gilmartin-Willsey and the Armonk Independent Fire Department for all that they do day in and day out to make this town a better and safer place to live, work and play in.

5. As far as I’m concerned every day should be Mother’s Day. With three kids ages 10 and under, there is a lot of worrying when it comes to parenting. Just read Armonk mom Marlene Kern Fischer’s essay and you’ll see what I’m talking about. That’s why the moms in your life should be celebrated and for me, having a meal with loved ones where I don’t have to be a short order cook or clean up afterwards sounds heavenly. Check out some delicious local options to make mom happy.

6. A few summers ago, a friend of mine took me kayaking on Candlewood Lake. Having grown up in the city, I had never been kayaking before and I loved everything about it. The tranquility of being on the water, the rhythmic strokes needed to propel the kayak forward. It was one of those rare afternoons when I felt truly present and appreciative of the beautiful scenery. Luckily there are many options for kayakers of all levels right here in Westchester. Read our round-up of local spots and take to the waters!

Enjoy,