The Inside Press

Magazines serving the communities of Northern Westchester

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The Best Mother’s Day Gift

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We are all children of Mothers but becoming Mothers is a life changing experience. Not all women choose to become parents and I totally get the decision to swim against the tide, but those of us, who always wanted to be a Mom look forward to the festivities of Mother’s Day. I always feel loved and appreciated by my daughter but on that May day heralded by constant media pressure, (and I admit my firm instructions that I be honored), required the breakfast in bed tradition, Hallmark card and maybe a bunch of flowers even if picked from the just beginning to bloom garden. Now that she’s grown and flown a first thing phone call and a card in the mail and hopefully brunch pleases me just fine.

I started trying to get pregnant when I was 34 and knew it would likely be my only child and I desperately wanted a girl. I will never forget my Mom (who also had a good and devoted son) saying to me that there is nothing like having a daughter because you will be friends for life, as she was with her Mother. Mom and I loved each other dearly but I will admit sometimes I was not the best of friends as I was very independent and craved autonomy, even from an early age, but still we had a devotion and innate understanding such as the deep kinship we get from our woman friends. As we both got older and wiser and after I had a child, I understood her and the bond of parenthood more deeply and allowed myself to inch closer and was devoted to her till the end and was grateful to have been the person she turned to for comfort and strength. 

After enjoying my professional life, having sated my hunger for travel and adventure I finally became pregnant at 35. As is customary with pregnancies when one is in her mid 30s, I had ultrasound and amniocentesis. The baby was in a position that gender could not be determined. I awaited the amnio results which came in the mail stating that I would indeed be having a baby girl!  I was jubilant but needed confirmation before I told my Mom so I called the lab before giving her the good news. Yes, it was true, and I told her before anyone else and her tearful joy was among the happiest moments we shared together. She was a devoted remarkable grandmother who lived and breathed for this precious only grandchild. This was in fact the best Mother’s Day gift I could have ever given her.

The beauty of this tale is that I do have a daughter who is my best friend. From the moment she came out after 12 hours of exhaustive pushing we looked each other in the eyes like old friends and our profound life of connection started. She was an easy baby, respectful teen and now a remarkable woman of 27. We have rarely fought, think alike, get each other’s jokes, finish each other’s sentences, have the same easy big smile and the green eyes I got from my Dad.

We have laid in bed chatting for hours, dried each other’s tears, watched Pretty Woman endless times, plowed through Gilmore Girls, taken numerous girl trips and shared quite a few Margaritas, arm in arm traipsing through the streets of Manhattan. Honestly, I never imagined the depth of what loving a child could be and I continue to be amazed by the reciprocity of our affection and true pleasure we both enjoy simply by being together.

Now she has a real love in her life, and I have to move over a bit to give them the space to grow their bond and likely marriage and her eventual journey into motherhood. I was nervous at first of losing a bit of her to this new stage, but it has not been the case as we share and talk about the joys and challenges of partnership and our pillow talk is now about men not boys. We still giggle and laugh and plan for the future promising our girl trips will always continue. Oh, and she hopes to have a girl so they can be best friends just like us! That is indeed the best Mother’s Day gift ever.

For the Love of a Dog

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Love, unconditional love

The love I feel for my dog Maggie Mae

And the love Maggie Mae has for me, her person.

My protector, my defender,

The best company

Always by my side.

I can’t imagine my life without her.

No one will ever love you like your dog.

Love, unconditional love.

©Ronni Diamondstein 2022

 

Ronni and Maggie Mae.          Photo by Carolyn Simpson

 

 

Blanketing the Town with Love

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There’s Elf on a Shelf and there’s Mensch on a Bench, but we have a “Mystery Mensch” in our midst. Mensch is the Yiddish word for a good person. Our Mystery Mensch got busy crocheting colorful throws to keep her busy since March and quarantine set in. More than a dozen of these handcrafted gifts were sent by the Mystery Mensch who had lived in Chappaqua for 20 years before relocating to Virginia.

The Mystery Mensch doesn’t necessarily know all the people she crochets for. She asked friends in Chappaqua to recommend recipients. “They have to be a good human being who does good for the community. I would ask people who they thought I should make a throw and they threw out names to me. Cristina Lee was one of them.” The Mystery Mensch would contact the recipient and ask them to send her a picture of their couch and four of their favorite colors.

“I was very grateful to be chosen,” said Cristina Lee, a founder of the Tri-State Mask Making Group. “It’s a very special gift, especially because she made it with so much love during COVID. She did it for special people and I’m honored.”

Our Mystery Mensch has a history of performing acts of kindness. The former Westchester County parole officer organized a meal train for someone who was undergoing treatment for cancer whom she only knew from Facebook. She took her to the doctor and checked in on her regularly. She was a source of comfort to this woman who says she will be forever grateful to her.

When she moved to Richmond three years ago to be near one of her children she continued to do good deeds. Last year she made scarves for first grade children in a disadvantaged school in Richmond. “I don’t have the social life I had in Chappaqua,” the Mystery Mensch explains. “I needed something to do.” She plans to crochet scarves for the Kindergarteners in the school.

Two years ago, she got involved with another project. She joined a small group of people who would meet immigrants at the Richmond bus station coming from Honduras, El Salvador and Guatemala who were on their way north from Immigration camps in Texas.

The group of volunteers brought them care packages of food, clothing and drinks.  “Many of my Chappaqua friends sent me boxes of food and treats and drinks. I couldn’t afford to keep buying things. It was my Chappaqua friends who stepped up and sent me stuff. That’s when collaboration became one of my favorite words.”

The Mystery Mensch also started what she calls “Bagel Thursday.” “I have been getting donated bagels and people come to my house and pick them up from my porch.”

Crocheting the multicolored striped throws was beneficial for the Mystery Mensch as well as the lucky recipients. “I don’t have much to do since retirement and not being able to socialize now because of COVID-19, I needed to keep busy.” She watches a lot of television while she crochets away. “I miss going out for coffee and lunch or dinner with friends.” Prior to COVID-19 she traveled a lot to visit her children and has been to South Africa since her retirement.

When asked what lessons she learned in life, she said, “I’ve learned to be humble.” That explains her wish to be anonymous for this story and sums up the Mystery Mensch quite well. An unpretentious person doing good for the pure joy of the deed. A real Mensch!

Love at the Engine Company

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PHOTO By Donna Mueller

When Debra Johnson (“Debbie”) walked into the Briarcliff Volunteer Fire Department with her friend Rachel Leihbacher in August 1982 intending to join as the first female members, William Johnson (“Bill”) didn’t think much of it. They sat down next to him and he talked to them. Soon, chaos ensued amongst members determined to keep these women out of the all-male company. Two men quit because of the perceived intrusion but the women underwent training and quickly proved to be valuable members of the department, running into burning buildings and taking every call they could.

Bill and Debbie became great friends going on calls together and seeing each other at meetings and drills. “I would look forward to seeing her on those calls,” remembers Bill. “By the annual dinner dance in May of 1983, we were dating. We married seven years later.”

Both born and bred in Briarcliff, they only got to know each other when they both joined the fire department. For Bill, a Westchester County police detective, serving the community was in his blood. Both his father Arthur Johnson Jr. and grandfather Arthur Johnson were Briarcliff police chiefs and firefighters. His grandfather’s brother Buck Johnson was the fire chief and his grandfather’s brother Charles Johnson was killed in the line of duty with the Briarcliff police department in 1927.

“My husband is the most amazing man in my life and such a rock star,” says Debbie. “He’s by my side for everything we’ve endured and he’s always doing for me.”

Debbie recently retired from nursing after 36 years at Northern Westchester Hospital, but remains an active volunteer in addition to her private duty nursing work. “I just love making a difference. The fire department gives me a sense of accomplishment and I love going to car accidents and helping the victims out.”

They often respond to calls together. When their two kids were young, they would swap off or Debbie’s mother would watch the kids.

One of Bill’s worst experiences was responding to an accident in the middle of the night while Debbie was working at the hospital and discovering that it was Debbie’s brother, badly injured, in the accident. He remembers showing up at the hospital to tell Debbie.

The couple has seen a lot of tragedy together, particularly in car accidents, and it helps that they can talk about it with each other.

These days, Bill keeps an extra eye out for Debbie when they’re at the scene of an accident. “Responding to auto accidents is not safe. EMS has been hit on calls because of distracted driving,” he says.

It’s pretty clear to me, however, that he always has his eye on his beloved.

Living in Downtown Armonk: Just Close Enough to the Action

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Living in downtown Armonk affords its residents easy access to many points of interest including restaurants, shops and green spaces. The Kapur family calls the area home and has many reasons to love living there.

Leena, a stay-at-home-mom, Nick, who works in energy information and children Deven, age 8, Sareena, age 6 and Naya, age 4 enjoy all that their Armonk neighborhood has to offer. The family moved to the area 6.5 years ago after their second child was born. They were looking for more space than they had in their Manhattan apartment. “My family was in Long Island, Nick’s was in Connecticut, so Westchester was the perfect in-between for us. We had this idealistic view of living in a neighborhood where kids could ride their bikes and play with other kids in the neighborhood,” says Leena.

Fortunately for the family, that view became a reality when they found their Armonk home.  As Leena says, “We instantly fell in love when we pulled into our street and saw all the neighborhood kids riding their bikes together – it was an unscheduled playdate which is so unheard of these days.” The easy access to downtown make the Kapurs neighborhood ideal for the family. “It’s an easy 8-minute walk from our house – and super friendly neighbors,” says Leena.

The neighborhood is also a hot-spot for Halloween celebrations. Each year, close to 2,000   trick-or-treaters and their families come for Halloween. Neighbors decorate their lawns and create a special atmosphere for all involved. And it’s not just the kids that get into the spirit, many of the adults wear costumes and the event has grown with each passing year. In addition, during the holiday season, families stroll throughout the neighborhood singing carols.

Living in downtown Armonk, there’s always something to do. Says Leena, “We have many impromptu play dates for the kids at the playground and usually plan neighborhood drinks with our neighbors every couple of weeks.” Luckily there are many local restaurant options within short walking distance.