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4/11 Book Reading: Westchester Resident’s Poignant Memoir, The Bridesmaid’s Daughter

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The Mental Health Association of Westchester (MHA) is thrilled to host Pound Ridge’s Nyna Giles and co-author Eve Claxton for the exclusive Westchester reading of their poignant and unflinching portrait of Nyna’s mother Carolyn, whose glamorous life was sidelined by mental health issues. THE BRIDESMAID’S DAUGHTER: FROM GRACE KELLY’S WEDDING TO A WOMEN’S SHELTER—SEARCHING FOR THE TRUTH ABOUT MY MOTHER (St. Martin’s Press; on sale March 27, 2018) is a riveting investigation to unearth the lost pieces of Carolyn’s remarkable life story, as well as tell the tale of the daughter who reclaimed her mother’s memory.

To be held on Wednesday, April 11 at 7 p.m. at the Walker Center for the Arts at the Harvey School in Katonah, the book launch reading includes a Q&A, book signing and refreshments; tickets can be purchased at www.mhawestchester.org for $25. This special event – a rare occurrence to hear from both authors in person – raises awareness for mental health issues and benefits MHA, a community-based nonprofit that provides innovative, person-centered treatment.

“We are thrilled that Nyna has chosen to shine a light on the importance of mental health and getting the right help at the right time. MHA is honored to partner with both authors for this exciting reading of their new release,” said MHA CEO Charlotte Östman, LCSW-R.

“Telling my mother’s story in ‘The Bridesmaid’s Daughter’ has been a highly emotional journey – laying bare the heartbreak and devastation mental illness can cause a family,” said Nyna Giles. “This project was extremely painful at times, but ultimately was one of the most fulfilling events in my life. It illustrates the importance of early intervention and treatment, and has enabled me to find a tangible way to give my mother’s life meaning by helping others. I hope that by sharing her story, I can start many important conversations about mental health advocacy. This is why I feel The Mental Health Association of Westchester is vital to our community, ensuring that mental health services are readily available to those who need it the most.”

At 29 years old, Westchester native Nyna was in line at the supermarket when she looked down and saw the headline: “Former Bridesmaid of Princess Grace Lives in Homeless Shelter.” Nyna was stunned: her family’s private ordeal was front page news. The woman on that cover was her mother. The truth was, she barely knew who her mother had been before marriage. She knew Carolyn had been a model – arriving in New York in 1947 and rooming at the legendary Barbizon Hotel for Women, where she’d met the young Grace Kelly. The two had become fast friends, and Nyna had seen the photos of her mother at Grace’s wedding, wearing the bridesmaid gown that had hung in her mother’s closet for years. But how had the seemingly confident, glamorous woman in those pictures become the mother she knew growing up – the mother who told her Nyna she was too ill to go to school and kept her isolated at home?

Nyna Giles and Eve Claxton

THE BRIDESMAID’S DAUGHTER is a deeply personal memoir about friendship and motherhood, and a clarion call for improving mental healthcare. In telling her own and her mother’s story, Nyna aims to raise awareness for mental health advocacy so that no one else has to experience the issues Carolyn and her family did.

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PRAISE FOR THE BOOK

“A fascinating true story.”

—Good Housekeeping

“Celebrates a lifelong female friendship while shedding light on a powerful, if at times painful and complex, mother-daughter bond. A poignantly compelling memoir about family, mental health, and revisiting the past.”
—Kirkus Reviews

“This is a fascinating story of the toll of mental illness and a daughter’s search for understanding and forgiveness.”
—Booklist

“Here is the heart-rending story of two beautiful and glamorous women, and the spirals of disaster into which one of their lives tumbled. As daughter and detective, Nyna Giles writes with moving sensitivity about the dazzling Grace Kelly and her best friend — Nyna’s own mother. The book unfolds like a novel — a tragic and deeply moving saga. Read it   and weep.”

—Robert Lacey, bestselling author of Grace: Her Lives – Her Loves

 

“Straight from the heart, and told with great bravery, The Bridesmaid’s Daughter is a fascinating and powerful story of a daughter’s love for a flawed parent and the struggle to understand a tumultuous childhood.”

—Wendy Lawless, New York Times bestselling author of Chanel Bonfire

 

ABOUT THE AUTHORS

NYNA GILES is the youngest daughter of Carolyn Scott Reybold, a Ford model best known as one of Grace Kelly’s bridesmaids. Nyna has worked in advertising sales with leading media organizations such as Westchester Magazine, 914INC, Westchester Home, The Daily Voice, Record-Review and Westchester and Fairfield County Business Journals. Today she is COO of Giles Communications. She is also an advocate for the mentally ill, having served as a vice president on the board of The Association for Mentally Ill Children of Westchester for ten years. In the spring of 2015, Nyna and her husband, Peter, co-chaired The Mental Health Association of Westchester’s MHA On The Move 5K Run/Walk. Nyna lives in Westchester with her husband, and has three grown children and three stepchildren.

EVE CLAXTON is a writer, editor, and Peabody award-winning radio producer. Since 2006, she’s worked as an editor or co-writer on popular non-fiction books for major publishers including the memoir “He Wanted the Moon,” co-written with Mimi Baird, described by The New York Times as “utterly impossible to put down” and currently being adapted for Brad Pitt’s Plan B with a screenplay by Tony Kushner. Eve is also the editor of The Book of Life an anthology of the best memoir writing throughout the ages.

ABOUT THE MENTAL HEALTH ASSOCIATION OF WESTCHESTER

For more than 70 years, The Mental Health Association of Westchester has promoted mental health in Westchester through advocacy, community education and direct services. MHA offers a range of services that are recovery-oriented, trauma-informed and individualized to promote recovery and wellness. To learn more, visit www.mhawestchester.org.

A Mindful Chat with Jodi Baretz

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Walking into Millwood resident Jodi Baretz’ office is like walking into a sanctuary. The atmosphere is hushed, shoes are left at the door, voices are kept to a whisper. The effect is immediately relaxing.

Baretz, 49, is a psychotherapist specializing in mindfulness and health coaching at The Center for Health and Healing, located on Smith Avenue in Mt. Kisco. She is also the author of the new book, Mindful is the New Skinny: 10 Transformational Steps to a Lighter You Inside and Out, due out this spring. Inside Chappaqua sat down to talk to her about the book as well as her own journey to mindfulness.

An Emory and Columbia University-educated therapist, Baretz has more than 20 years of clinical experience. She has spent the last five years focusing her practice on using mindfulness to overcome stress, weight loss issues and family conflicts. Mindful is the New Skinny started out as a six-week boot camp designed to introduce her patients to the practice of mindfulness.

“I wanted to create a program that would teach people how to reduce stress,” she said. “We need to change our mindset from our weight to our well-being, which is more sustainable and will help us live happier, healthier, more peaceful lives.”

Her message is geared toward helping women who are not only struggling with weight issues, but also with any family and work-related anxiety.

“As a health coach and psychotherapist, it made sense to me to write a book that encompassed the mind and body,” she said. While the book does address eating issues, it is not a weight-loss book. Rather, it looks at all aspects of life that cause stress with the goal of reducing that stress, and getting people to realize that perfection should not be a goal.

But what exactly is mindfulness? And how is mindfulness different from meditation?

As Baretz explains it, mindfulness is the awareness of your thoughts, feelings and environment. Once you acknowledge the source of what you are feeling–whether it’s hunger, anxiety, or stress–you use meditation to calm and center yourself. In effect, you are striving to create a space between a stimulus and the response.

Baretz’ own path to mindfulness began after she was diagnosed with celiac disease in her mid-thirties. Initially devastated by the diagnosis, she enrolled in a holistic nutrition program at the Institute for Integrative Nutrition in New York City to help her understand and control the disease. While there, she was introduced to the concepts of mindfulness and spirituality.

“It was a life-changing experience for me,” she said. “I started to see positive changes flow into my life, and I let go of a lot of worry and anxiety.” Since then, she has continued to study mindfulness and meditation as a way to help her patients deal with the stresses of everyday life.

Though weight issues are addressed in the book, her message is more about self-compassion and self-care, and Baretz teaches mindfulness as a way of life. As anyone who has been on a diet and failed can attest, maintaining a strict diet regimen is often impossible and almost always self-defeating.

“The book is all about nourishing yourself from the inside, so you can flourish on the outside,” she said. While many women focus on trying to be the perfect size (in our society, that means skinny), Baretz stresses that mindfulness can help switch our priority from what we look like to the acceptance of ourselves as we are, which is very empowering.

Mindfulness can also help with all aspects and relationships in your life, Baretz notes. “Mindfulness increases your capacity to deal with stress and overwhelming situations because you are learning how to calm your body and your mind,” she said. “It’s not shutting off your thoughts; rather, it’s pressing a ‘stop’ button on them so you can change your relationship toward them.” After all, we all face adversity in one way or another, and there are many things in life that are beyond our control. While we can’t control the challenges we face, mindfulness and meditation help us “struggle well,” she said. “By taming our minds and focusing on the present, we can decrease our anxiety.”

The book brings mindfulness and meditation to people who wouldn’t normally seek out a practice that does have some negative stereotypes–something only for the yoga and Zen set. But Baretz hopes that the book will open people’s minds to the power of the practice. And that, she says, is her goal.

“I love watching people transform,” she said. “When they change the way they think, their whole world changes.”

Each chapter of Mindful is the New Skinny, which is Baretz’ first book, features a meditation session that can be downloaded. The book will be available this spring/summer on Amazon in print and kindle versions, and Baretz will conduct a free book talk at the Chappaqua library upon the book’s release. Visit www.jodibaretz.com for more information on her practice, upcoming talks, as well as a sneak peek free chapter of her book.

‘What Happened’ Book Signing by Hillary Clinton: A SOLD OUT Event at the Chappaqua Library

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On Saturday, September 23, 3-5 p.m., the Chappaqua Library will host a now SOLD OUT book signing event for Secretary Hillary Rodham Clinton and her already much discussed new title What Happened.

This will be Clinton’s third book signing at the Library following packed and also sold out events over the years at the Chappaqua Library too for signings of It Takes a Village and Hard Choices.

“Hillary Clinton is a really strong supporter of the local library,” noted Pamela Thornton, executive director of the Chappaqua Library. “We are always glad to host her when asked. Of course as you can imagine, the logistics take a great deal of preparation for safety and security reasons but it’s always an exciting event. It’s a special event for everyone.

“It’s a unique opportunity for local residents to meet  Secretary Clinton and have a book personally signed by her,” Thornton added. “But she’s also a resident of Chappaqua and a local author who chooses to support her community and library by being here.”     — Grace Bennett

The Library’s release noted the following for attendees:

This is a book signing only. Each $32 ticket (including tax) includes a wristband to access the signing line, as well as ONE hardcover copy of What Happened; books are distributed at the signing table. YOU MUST BRING YOUR TICKET TO THE EVENT.

Wristbands for entry will be distributed to ticketholders beginning at 9:00 AM on the day of the event. Please arrive no earlier than 9:00 AM and no later than 4:30 PM. All ticketholders will have their book(s) signed.   Additional copies of What Happened, as well as Clinton’s new children’s picture book It Takes a Village, will be available for sale on site through Scattered Books and the Village Bookstore.  Clinton will sign up to two (2) books total per customer (signature only, no personalization).

No other books or memorabilia, personalizing, or posing for photos.

Due to increased security, customers will not be allowed to bring any large items (bags, chairs, etc.) into the event space. A bag check will be provided.

The Chappaqua Library also offered thanks to Scattered Books and the Village Bookstore “for making this event possible.”

Excerpt From Jacqueline Goldstein’s ‘Ms. Murphy’s Makeover’

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Jacqueline Goldstein’s Ms. Murphy’s Makeover is the story of a collapsing marriage and second-time-around love, but it also provides insider insight into a topical problem–the pitfalls of too much emphasis on standardized testing in schools today. An urban teacher and suburban wife, Charlotte Murphy, comes to suspect that her husband is cheating and that the principal of the vocational school where she teaches English has changed the answers on a Regents exam. Sensing their teacher’s unhappiness, her students contrive to give her a movie-star makeover. When they’re done, Charlotte doesn’t recognize herself and vows to change her life. Charlotte’s new life is complicated by the attention of Theodore Lagakis, the school’s dean, who has a hidden agenda. Whom can she trust? …

4th-cover“Bertie Trombetta died last night. A heart attack. The witch is dead!”

It took a moment for Charlotte to process this information. In the distance, a church bell chimed. Ask not for whom the bell tolls.

Natalie bowed her head and folded her hands in pretend piety, their lacquered red nails pointing to the ceiling. “There is a God, after all.”

Charlotte closed her eyes and swallowed hard. “Dead? Are you sure? She was here Friday, teaching across the hall.”

The image of Bertha Trombetta, smoking, floated before Charlotte’s eyes.

“Screaming her head off, probably. I bet she gave herself the heart attack. But I must say her timing was perfect.”

This was cold, even for Natalie. But the principal was under a lot of pressure. Charlotte thought she understood. “Are you saying the visitors won’t come?”

Natalie gave a short laugh. “Nothing can stop that.” She placed her hands on Charlotte’s desk and leaned in close. “Life goes on. That’s actually why I’m here. Charlotte, I need you to go to Bertie’s funeral.”

Charlotte immediately shook her head no.

Natalie waved a hand, anticipating Charlotte’s objection. “I know, I know. I should go myself. Normally, I would. But I can’t this week. Not with the visitors from State Ed here. And someone has to represent the school.”

Charlotte thought of an escape. “Does Lagakis know?”

Natalie nodded. “I just told him. He’s in his office, on the phone with the family.”

“Perfect. Send him. Or do we need him in the school?”

Natalie laughed a second time. “Be serious. But yes, he asked and I can’t very well refuse. You’ll have to go with him. I’m sorry.”

Charlotte exploded. “No! And Bertie wouldn’t want me there.”

Natalie smiled, showing newly whitened teeth. “She won’t know.”

Technically, Charlotte could refuse. But Natalie was more than her boss. She was a friend, of sorts. Twenty years ago, they had attended the same college. Natalie recognized Charlotte at a job fair three years ago and offered her the position of teaching English at a vocational high school for cosmetology.

At the time, downsizing at Francis’s firm had made the Murphys anxious, and Francis had been relieved when Charlotte was offered work. He’d kept his job, however, along with a big raise. Now he was after her to quit. And Charlotte didn’t want to.

Natalie pressed her advantage. “You owe me, sweetie. I need this.”

Charlotte made a last ditch effort. “Look.” She pointed at her stack of journals. “I’m swamped.”

“Sweetie, I know you don’t read those things, anyway.”

“I read every word. Unless they ask me not to. It’s for critical thinking.” Charlotte put air quotes around the last two words.

“Save the buzz words for the visitors. I need this, Charlotte. With you there, maybe Lagakis will behave himself.”

“Good luck with that.” Charlotte sighed. “But all right. Under protest. And you owe me.”

“Excellent. Now. A teensy suggestion. At the funeral, glam up a little. Lose the librarian look for a day. Black dress. Heels. Hair down.”

“The librarian look? Is it that bad?”

“Look, we are a school of beauty here. So. You have a black dress?”

“I do, but Francis says black makes me look—conspicuous.” Her husband had used another word, but Natalie didn’t need more ammunition.

“Oh, yes. Pope Francis. Was he speaking ex cathedra?”

Charlotte had to smile at the image of her husband in papal vestments.

“I’d be on the phone to my lawyer so fast.”
Maybe that’s why you’re divorced. Aloud, Charlotte said, “What does it matter what I wear?”

One of Natalie’s more annoying habits was whispering behind her hand. She did so now, although they were alone in an empty room. “You never know who will show up at these things. Bertie was always threatening to go to the media. There may be reporters. That woman had a big mouth.”

“So? Wait. Is something wrong? Is that why State Ed is coming?”

Natalie looked Charlotte full in the eye. “Don’t be ridiculous. It’s a purely routine visit.”

Jacqueline Goldstein
Jacqueline Goldstein

Chappaqua resident Jacqueline Grandsire Goldstein grew up in the Fordham section of the Bronx, and taught high school English there for 25 years. After retiring from teaching, Jacqueline began to take classes at The Writing Institute at Sarah Lawrence College and also joined the informal writing workshop run by Joan Schulman at the Chappaqua Library. Her debut novel, Ms. Murphy’s Makeover, is a work of fiction, but it reflects her experiences as an urban teacher and suburban wife and mother. Jacqueline will be reading excerpts, taking questions, and signing books at nearby public libraries in December 8 (in North Castle), January 7 (in Bronxville, and January 21 (in Mount Kisco). For more information, visit www.jacquelinegoldstein.com.

How Chelsea Clinton Inspires Kids to Make a Difference with New Book, It’s Your World

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Amanda with Chelsea Clinton at the Chappaqua Library book signing
Amanda with Chelsea Clinton
at the Chappaqua Library book signing

By Amanda H. Cronin

On Thursday September 24, I got the opportunity to speak with Chelsea Clinton about her new book, It’s Your World–Get Informed, Get Inspired, and Get Going! Chelsea is the Vice Chair of the Clinton Foundation, and is the daughter of our very own illustrious Bill and Hillary Clinton. Chelsea has traveled all over the world working on humanitarian projects where she met and was inspired by children of diverse socioeconomic and ethnic backgrounds. In this, her first book, she talks about the ways kids can make a difference in our world, and how they already are. Here’s the exchange I was fortunate to have with her prior to her Chappaqua Library book signing.

Amanda: Thank you so much for taking the time to talk with me!

Chelsea Clinton: Thank you for being interested in It’s Your World!

Amanda: What inspired you to write this book now?

Chelsea Clinton: I continue to be struck by the curiosity of young people. Adults should recognize that young people are taking charge and are en- gaged in making a difference. Knowing that I was going to become a mom lent a greater urgency to writing this book because I felt even more of a respon- sibility. I wanted to empower young people to make a difference across our country and across the world.

Amanda: In your book, you say that, “more than anything else, education is an area where adults should listen to kids,” and that you hope that students “will speak up and speak out about what we think education should mean in our schools.” Can you please explain more about this?

Chelsea Clinton: Yes! Oftentimes people say to me, “What do you think kids should care about?” And I say, “Well, just ask kids, they’ll tell you!”

It’s up to us as adults to support kids in engaging in making a difference. I certainly think that that’s true in schools. Kids spend more time in school than they do at home, so trying to listen–actually, not even trying–listening to kids about what they want to learn in school, and how they think they’ll best learn in school, is something that I believe every adult should do.

Amanda: Millions of kids are being held back from going to school because of their gender, their economic hardships, or because there is simply no school around. We are very lucky here in Chappaqua to have such an outstanding school system. How can we help girls and boys around the world who don’t have the same educational opportunities?

Chelsea Clinton: Since 1918, every kid in the U.S. has had the right to a free public education. In a lot of countries, kids don’t have that right, or there is that right but it is not put into practice because there just aren’t enough schools, or teachers, or materials. Organizations that build schools and provide funding to train teachers are so powerful because they are solving problems in places where communities clearly want their kids to go to school. At Horace Greeley, something that you can do is to sponsor the building of a school!

Amanda: You seem to be really hopeful and optimistic about the capability of today’s kids to tackle these huge issues. Why do you believe that
we can?

Chelsea Clinton: Because you already are! I hope that is apparent for anyone that reads It’s Your World. Kids are already profoundly impacting such things as the health of their families, saving iconic species like elephants, and helping school environments become safer. The strong answer to your question is all the stories that I am so grateful to be able to share about kids who are making real, tangible, meaningful impact across the world today.

Amanda: Now a hometown question… Do you like visiting your parents in Chappaqua?

Chelsea Clinton: It’s a beautiful place, and my parents love living in Chappaqua, even more than they thought they would. My husband and I love visiting; it feels very much like home. It’s really nice now that I am a mom to have a place to go where Charlotte [her daughter] can crawl around on the grass.

Amanda: Yes, I love it too! Thank you so much for talking with me today!

Chelsea Clinton: Thank you!

Amanda Cronin is a junior at Horace Greeley High School. She is news editor of The Greeley Tribune, a student of Writopia Lab, and a member of the iMatter Youth Council. She hopes to one day make a difference in our world.