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Train crash

Let Us Be That Village!

March 4, 2015 by Beth Besen

Beth Besen
Beth Besen

Recently, in a less-than-perfectly-scientific but, nonetheless, perfectly “grace”ful facebook inquiry, Inside Press Publisher and Editor Grace Bennett asked for community feedback regarding the level of interest in, and continued enjoyment of, Inside Chappaqua magazine. The response was immediate and heartfelt–you like us, you really like us! I have to say, the Sally Field moment felt absolutely wonderful.

There is something very special about a community that comes together to support its own. From shopping local to becoming involved in community matters to reaching out to those in need (or admitting a need and asking for help!), our town is so much more than leafy streets and handsome homes. We are proud that one of our famous residents, Hillary Rodham Clinton, coined that resonant and oft-repeated phrase “it takes a village.” Modesty aside, we’d like to think we had a hand in inspiring her thinking.

Certainly, it felt that way during the horrific Metro-North Railroad incident of early February. Initial social media posts indicated that “an accident” had occurred, and that delays to the evening commute were likely to follow. People began to reach out to family and friends, seeking to reassure each other of whereabouts and safety. Before long, however, it became all too clear that this was no small accident; instead, the February 3rd, 5:45 evening rush hour train from Grand Central Station direct to Chappaqua became the express train to a brutal nightmare for many in our area.

Even as news helicopters circled the air above, information was starting to circulate our communal information airways. And it wasn’t good. Six people were killed, many others sustained injuries. Then, we started to hear names and the abstract–as awful, as unfathomable as that was–became specific. People we knew, people in our very own community, were among those who died in the crash. We shared our grief; with each other and, respectfully, with those families, friends and colleagues who mourned. We tried to make sense of a senseless thing, even as we asked what we could do and wondered how to make sure something like this would and could never happen again.

This issue of Inside Chappaqua was conceived to celebrate Spring Awakenings; the new and noteworthy, the fresh and forward, the energy that turn turn turns things in this renaissance season. In that spirit, and as planned, we have some truly wonderful articles to entertain and inspire you.

Our gorgeous cover comes courtesy of local artist Peg Sackler. We chose it both for its rich representation of spring‘s lush beauty, and because we’re proud to highlight an exciting new local collective, the Northern Westchester Artist’s Guild or NWAG. Please do turn to page 11 to read more about this creative and talented group of artists.

And, while we’re on the subject of groups, what could be nearer and dearer than our very own Chappaqua and Millwood Chamber of Commerce. There’s a new board with fresh vision and energy, and we’re as pleased as can be to bring you the complete story inside; just turn to page 15.

What else brings a community together? How about recreation and sports? Most would agree there’s nothing quite like spring sports to encourage both players and spectators to enjoy themselves. The days lengthen, the air turns soft and the play’s the thing! Frequent contributor Dan Levitz gives us his best pitch on Chappaqua Men’s B League softball. Page 18.

Speaking of sports and community, we’ve also got a very special tale of two local high school teams that came together for a shared love of football. Without giving too much away here, let’s just say that a couple of otherwise competitive teams put good sportsmanship first and foremost, and then saw some collective dreams come true in the process. Turn to page 23 to read all about it.

As for the rest? Flip our pages and enjoy. We’re great to curl up with on your comfy home couch, equally at ease out and about in town, perhaps 
as a coffee companion in one of our inviting shops! Our hope springs eternal that you’ll continue to like and appreciate our articles and, as always, 
we invite you to email us your thoughts; we love to hear from each and every one of you!

As we spring forward this season, 
we owe it to ourselves and each other to remember to live each day for the gift it is, and to remember our neighbors and community in our thoughts and deeds and prayers. Let’s continue to be that village it takes.

All my best,

Beth Besen

“We tried to make sense of a senseless thing, even as we asked what we could do and wondered how to make sure something like this would and could never happen again.”

Filed Under: The Inside Scoop Tagged With: Accident, community, Inside Chappaqua magazine., Metro North, Train crash

“Our Hearts Are Broken”

March 4, 2015 by The Inside Press

Joseph Nadol
Joseph Nadol

In the immediate aftermath of the Metro-North accident, we expressed hope that everyone arrives home safely. Tragically, three members of our community did not.

On behalf of the Town of New Castle, we want to express our sincere condolences to the families and loved ones of Joseph Nadol of Ossining, Robert Dirks of Chappaqua and Ellen Brody, who worked at ICD Contemporary Jewelry. Our thoughts and prayers go out to these three as well as to all victims and all affected by this tragedy. Our hearts are broken.

Joseph Nadol, 42, of Ossining, is survived by his wife, Jen, and his three young sons. Joseph worked at JP Morgan as an aerospace and defense equity analyst. He was ranked as one of the top analysts covering aerospace and defense. He received a bachelor’s degree from Harvard University. He loved skiing. His wife, Jen, regularly appeared at the Chappaqua Children’s Book Festival. In the acknowledgments section of her 2011 book, Jen wrote “Boundless gratitude to my husband, Joe, whose support makes writing and so many other things possible.”

Robert Dirks
Robert Dirks

Robert Dirks, 36, of Chappaqua is survived by his wife, Christine, and his two young children, ages 2 and 5. Robert was a research scientist for the chemistry division of D.E. Shaw Research. “Robert was a brilliant scientist who made tremendous contributions to our own research, and to the broader scientific community,” the company said in a statement. Robert was born in Bangkok, Thailand. He was an avid chess player in his younger years. He then turned to playing bridge. He met his wife playing bridge in college. They both attended the California Institute of Technology.

Ellen Brody, 49, is survived by her husband, Alan, and three daughters in their teens and 20s. Ellen worked at ICD Contemporary Jewelry in Chappaqua. She lived in the Edgemont section of Greenburgh. Ellen was looking forward to celebrating her 50th birthday next month. A sign hanging in the window of ICD stated “The ICD Family mourns the loss of Ellen Brody, our beloved colleague, and prays for her family and the other families whose loved ones were lost and injured in yesterday’s tragedy.”

Ellen Brody
Ellen Brody

Every day, members of our community leave their homes to embark on what should always be a safe commute to work along with an uneventful return home. Our Town commits to all of those who live and work here that it will never stop working to protect and preserve their safety.

Rob Greenstein

Town Supervisor, New Castle

Editor’s Note: In addition to the loss of lives here in New Castle, the crash also claimed the lives of two Westchester residents: Walter Liedtke, a curator of European paintings at the Metropolitan Museum of Art; Eric Vandercar, 53, a senior managing director at Mesirow Financial; and from Danbury, Connecticut: Aditya Tomar, 41, who worked in asset management at JPMorgan. The Inside Press together with New Castle mourns the loss of precious lives with all the families and friends who have been impacted by this tragedy.

Filed Under: Cover Stories Tagged With: Metro North, Tragedy, Train crash

Help for Emotional Trauma – at Phelps Memorial

March 4, 2015 by The Inside Press

By Ellen Bachner Greenberg

In the immediate aftermath of the train crash on February 3, 2015, local hospitals mobilized their trauma specialists and were ready to treat victims with physical injuries. Recognizing that a train crash of this magnitude can also affect people psychologically, Phelps Memorial Hospital Counseling Services also instituted a plan right away and notified the community that they are prepared and want to help anyone affected by this trauma through their counseling services.

Abby Schneider, LCSW, Program Director of Phelps Counseling Services, did not discuss the specifics of anyone connected to the crash, but did elaborate on the psychological symptoms people in the community might be experiencing. According to Schneider, the signs to look for following a traumatic event include “flashbacks, difficulty sleeping, nightmares, anything acute that was not there before, difficulty eating, and waking up in the middle of the night–maybe in a sweat.” These symptoms are not limited to only the injured, but can also be felt by those who were on the train. Additionally, a horrific train crash such as this one can also have traumatic effects on family and friends who worry about what happened to their loved ones. It would not be terribly unusual for commuters who ride the train regularly to “worry if this could happen again. It really does affect the entire community.”

For those who are experiencing some of these symptoms or feel the need for support, Schneider emphasizes the importance of reaching out for counseling. Phelps Counseling Services recognizes the need for immediacy and has instructed staff members to inform people contacting them regarding the crash that they can come in right away and be seen that day. Experiencing trauma need not be an immediate reaction and often something happens later on that might trigger the traumatic event again. This could even occur months later and at that time someone might become symptomatic. Schneider urges anyone in this situation to seek counseling at that time.

Schneider stresses that Phelps Counseling Services is “experienced in crisis intervention and is here and ready to help. We are responsive to the community and want to get the word out.”

Ellen Bachner Greenberg, a lifelong resident of Westchester, is a certified 
Life Coach.

Filed Under: Cover Stories Tagged With: Counseling services, hospital, Phelps Counseling Services, Train crash, Trauma

Lessons from a Tragedy

March 4, 2015 by The Inside Press

By Jodi Baretz

It is always more difficult to mourn when death is unexpected and tragic. The recent horrific train crash in Westchester this month from which six people were randomly taken from us, doesn’t make any sense. The impermanence and uncertainty of life is very difficult for us to wrap our heads around. Yet, sometimes it takes a tragedy to wake us up to how precious our lives are. When we face mortality, it puts everything in perspective. We all know of terminally ill patients who get a new lease on life, and often dramatically change the way they live. When we are faced with our own mortality, our whole view of life can change and we realize what matters. We live with more freedom and don’t sweat the small stuff.WomanYoga

Crisis as Opportunity

I learned about the fragility of life at an early age; I was just 15 when my father, 39, died tragically and unexpectedly. My life changed abruptly, and I have become the person I am today because of the many lessons learned from this shattering event. Sometimes, crisis can be an unbelievable opportunity to learn and grow. Its message may have been brought to all of us, so we wake up, enjoy the journey and be grateful for the gift of life.

We are always rushing to do more, and don’t often appreciate what we have. We wear stress as a badge of honor, and think: if we are busy, we must be important. We are in a race to nowhere. All this busyness can lead to depression, anxiety and lots of stress. There is no downtime anymore, and when there is, we have a multitude of screens that can distract us. When we live life in the fast lane, we don’t slow down enough to be present and live in each moment.

Our thoughts are stuck in the past, thinking about how we ended up in this unsatisfactory life, or in the future, being anxious about things that will probably never happen.

To experience peace, we have to intentionally slow down, connect with our current lives, and cultivate gratefulness. The practice of mindfulness is becoming increasingly popular in our culture, as one way to counteract all the “busyness” of our lives. It has been scientifically proven to decrease stress, as well as having a host of other emotional and physical benefits.

Today, technology gives us the ability to work around the clock, including weekends, and never turn it off. Mindfulness builds in a break for us, even from the constant chatter of our mind. It can bring us clarity, focus; an awareness arises when we pay attention to the present moment without judgment.

Meditation, as an exercise, quiets the mind; it literally can rewire the brain. People often say they can’t mediate because they could never slow down their mind. Guess what? Those people need it the most–myself included! Meditation is not shutting your mind off; that’s impossible. It is observing what thoughts are there, labeling them thinking, and then gently coming back to observing your breath. Simple enough. Five to ten minutes a day can make a huge difference. It may even bring you some peace to send thoughts of compassion to the victims of the crash, their families or others who are hurting. It also may be nice to send some much needed compassion to yourself and stop trying to always be better, smarter, richer. You’re fine the way you are!

Toward Peace of Mind

My heart goes out to the families of the victims. I know firsthand that, with time, they will survive, heal, grow and learn. I share my lesson and the lesson of the train crash with the hope that it helps you to appreciate life, slow down and change the way you relate to the mini-traumas of daily life. You cannot always change your circumstances, but how you respond to them defines your quality of life and peace of mind. What would you do differently if you knew you did not have a lot of time left?

In addition to being a Chappaqua mom, Jodi Baretz is a psychotherapist with a private practice at The Center for Health and Healing in Mt. Kisco. She leads a variety of mindfulness workshops including a Modern Day Mindfulness class for Chappaqua Continuing Ed, and a Mindfulness and Stigma workshop for “Stop Stigma Now,” both upcoming in March. You can reach her at jodibaretz@gmail.com, or visit her website, 
www.jodibaretz.com

Interfaith Council’s Blood Drive 


In response to the tragic accident, the Chappaqua Interfaith Council organized a blood donation drive on February 8th at Temple Beth El. Representatives from the New York Blood Center were on hand to take donations at Temple Beth El 
at 220 South Bedford Road 
here in Chappaqua.

Robert Dirks Memorial Fund

robert-dirksThe family of Robert Dirks has created a fund to help his wife, Christine, and two young children, Owen, 5, and Phoebe, 2, with immediate expenses. In the first 24 hours of the fund’s creation, almost $50,000 was raised, thanks to efforts by Chappaqua Cares and the Chappaqua Moms Facebook group. Friends and neighbors of the Dirks, as well as local businesses, have rallied to help.
A benefit is planned at Jodi’s Gym on March 15th.

Donations may be made at: www.youcaring.com

Robert Dirks Memorial and Family Fund

Filed Under: Cover Stories Tagged With: Metro North, Tragedy, Train crash

What ‘Making it’ Actually Means

March 4, 2015 by The Inside Press

Editor’s Note: In a search for meaning, Inside Chappaqua also came across this noteworthy post on Facebook from Rabbi Aaron Brusso, Spiritual Leader of 
Bet Torah Synagogue in Mount Kisco.

By Rabbi Aaron Brusso

Sometimes the dividing line between safety and danger is a surgical margin of glass and metal. The thickness of that margin in our minds is not measured in inches but in familiarity.

What we do every day feels like sitting on a cushioned bench reading emails or doing the crossword puzzle. What we do every day doesn’t feel even remotely connected to a collision in which the margin bends, twists and melts by fire. Life can feel like a dream lived in our minds until we are reminded how very real it is. Something happens and we wake to realize that we are here.

When our kids were little Hana and I would wake them up by singing:

Modeh ani lefanecha melech chai v’kayam she’hechazarta bi nishmati b’chemla. Rabbah emunatecha.

“I am grateful to You, living and enduring God, for restoring my soul to me in compassion. You are faithful beyond measure”.

We would sing a song to wake them up to the fact that they woke up. As they have gotten older, mornings have grown more hectic…and way too familiar. There seems to be less time for these sentiments. There seems to be less “usefulness” for them too.

But then there’s the day when mom takes the train and makes it home.

We spend so much time wondering if she will “make it on time” or “make it in time”. And then we remember what “making it” actually means.

There is a surgical margin of familiarity between one moment and the next in our lives. Moments that feel similar can go by without the awareness that we have arrived at a moment in time in which we have never before lived…and we are alive to see it. We are all hurtling forward surrounded by glass, metal and familiarity…things that protect us from danger… things that insulate us from appreciation.

May the memories of those who lost their lives be forever a blessing.

Filed Under: Cover Stories Tagged With: Metro North, Train crash

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