Inside Press

By Susan Pecker

Editor’s Note: A prominent local camp consultant (and Chappaqua mom) shares with us the joys of sleepaway camp.

10. Disney Was Not Joking. Michael D. Eisner, former CEO of Disney, shares that “camp is a guide to growing up, learning to rely on yourself as you work as a team, developing tools for leadership, competing to win but finding pride and growth in defeat.” That’s not Mickey Mouse stuff!

9. Me, Myself and I. Sleepaway camp is the one place a child can make decisions and problem-solve in a safe, caring environment without parents or teachers. At camp, children learn to manage conflicts and different personalities. Campers come home with increased confidence and a greater sense of independence.

8. All in the Family. While joining together in cleaning their bunk, painting scenery or playing in tournaments, campers become part of a new team of friends and counselors (from all over the country and world) who become a family reuniting year after year.

7. A Camp for a Child. Each child is unique. Some sparkle when playing soccer or performing on stage while others yearn to be the next best baker. There is a camp for each child to explore various interests.

6. The Best Part of the Day. Sleeping next to their best buddies, campers spend “flashlight time” sharing the day’s accomplishments, funniest moments and stories. Late night talks become one of the most bonding moments of camp.

5. Bragging Rights. Sleepaway camp exposes children to activities that are new and unique. Camp is a motivating place for children to grow and succeed–whether it’s getting up on water-skis for the first time, cheering a Color War song or writing for the camp newsletter.

4. Hands Are Not Just for Texting and Typing. At camp, children will rest their fingers from cell phones and computer keyboards. Campers’ fingers return to no-tech activities such as writing letters, whittling a wood bench and weaving a potholder.

3. Camp Is Not Just for the Camper. While their children are having fun-filled, action packed days, parents get a reprieve from the fast paced daily routines of packing lunches, carpooling and laundry. Sending a child away for a few weeks allows couples to renew, rediscover and recharge their relationship.

2. What They Enjoy. Without the pressure of homework and tests, campers discover what activities–not subjects–they enjoy and have fun doing. No one grades fun!

1. Winter, Spring, Summer And Fall. Ask anyone who went away to camp. Camp friends are year- round, life -long friends. Camp creates memories that last a lifetime.

Susan Pecker is a camp advisor with The Camp Connection, a camp advisory service for over 25 years and a reliable source for all types of camps (specialty, traditional, weight-loss, self-empowerment, etc.), as well as pre-college programs, community service, language immersion, teen travel and internships.

By Deborah Nelson and S.L. Shimer

We met online after separating from our spouses (each of us had been in long-term marriages and had three teenage kids). Although our backgrounds were different, there was a similar “feel” to our online profiles, leading to an optimistic introduction. Almost three very happy years later, we have been asked to share thoughts on building a successful relationship after divorce. Here they are!

10. Know what you want. This is not an easy suggestion, but it helps to narrow the field. Do you want kids? How far is too far geographically? How old is too old? How young is too young? How sexual are you? A mismatched level of sexual interest is a problem.

9. Reevaluate the importance of “common interests.” Much more critical is a “common mindset,” i.e., the ability to converse and connect in other ways (hint, hint). Common interests can be a plus, but they are not mandatory for a great relationship. However, if he is a golfer and you are not, be prepared to spend time alone or find another relationship!

8. “Good Enough” is not ok! If you have to convince yourself that you have feelings for the person you are dating, you have a problem. You cannot force “love” when deep down, you know something is not right. Trust your gut. If it feels forced, let go and move on.

7. Break old patterns. Be honest with yourself. The failure of your marriage was not totally the fault of your spouse. Figure out how you contributed to issues and slap yourself in the head if you find that pattern repeating itself in your next relationship. We often do not see our own blind spots, so be open to constructive criticism from a trusted friend.

6. Be realistic. Jennifer Aniston and George Clooney are not interested in you! In addition to the intangible characteristics that you seek in a partner, set your appearance goals realistically (this point especially applies to men).

5. Take a good look in the
mirror. If you are not happy with the level of talent you are attracting (Tip #6), work out at the gym, buy a new wardrobe, get a better haircut and/or a makeover.

4. Deal with the “focus”
issue. Ladies, all men have varying degrees of ADD. Accept this fact and do not get upset if he mentally wanders off when he is with you. Instead, bring him back with a caress or gentle kiss. Gentlemen, turn your BlackBerrys off once in a while and try to focus on her for an undivided 15 minutes once a day (in the bedroom does not count).

3. Men CAN make plans.
In marriages, some men get lazy and passive in planning activities, and women become controlling and “in charge.” Break this pattern! Once you are through the initial dating phase of your new relationship, men can cook romantic dinners, plan a night out and otherwise act like men. And their girlfriends can cede control and be taken care of occasionally.

2. Simply spend time together. Just because you do not have a “checklist” of items in common at the outset of your relationship, that does not mean you cannot enjoy each other’s company outside of the bedroom, whether it is exercising, finding a TV series you enjoy, or even reading and discussing the same book. On a good day, you can only spend three hours in bed when you are not sleeping, so find other things to do together!

1. Rediscover sex! Whatever your age, if you are single after a long-term relationship, or have been single for a while and not found the right person, you have been missing that “quality time” in the bedroom. So, when you find the right person: 1) enjoy yourself; 2) let the other person know how much you are enjoying it; 3) express yourself and your desires; and 4) focus on satisfying your partner.

Good luck and have fun!

Deborah Nelson is a health and wellness expert who has discovered the link between intimacy, confidence, and food, and uses her knowledge to support women in achieving their health, weight, sex and family goals. For more information, contact deborah@saucywellness.com or check out 10secondkiss.com. Also, look for Deborah’s upcoming book collaboration, a hilarious, yet serious look at how men act in relationships called Don’t Be An Idiot. S.L. Shimer, Deborah’s lucky boyfriend, lives in Chappaqua. He is a private equity fund manager.

By Nancy Shenker

10. First, you really do need to try. No one has ever succeeded in business without some amount of intent, exertion, talent, brilliant ideas, focus, commitment, flexibility, connections, or a healthy dose of all of them. Business is all about passion, attention to critical detail, and perseverance.

9. Think big picture and long term. Have a vision for where you are heading. Make sure you have a plan…a real one that’s written down. Your inner circle (see #7) can help to keep you on track.

8. That said, sweat the IMPORTANT small stuff too…especially your financials. “If it doesn’t make money, it doesn’t make sense.” Quality is still important (especially to customers).

7. Build your inner circle. Develop a small group of trusted advisors who you can go to for advice, creative thinking, and even just a cocktail or two and a shoulder to weep on when times are tough. When you find people you can trust, cling to them tightly (of course not literally…touching in the workplace can create legal issues). Don’t attempt to do everything yourself. Outsourcing can be your friend. Learn to delegate well.

6. Stay fresh. This is not a reference to personal hygiene. We’re talking about getting out and expanding your world. Read, read, read. Attend conferences (even those outside your industry). Remain open to new ideas. Do not begin every sentence with “Yes, but….” Instead, think “Here’s how….” Get out of your office and attend events. Talk to strangers.

5. Mourn fast and move on. Learn from past mistakes and don’t spend a lot of time beating yourself up. Don’t blame others either. Just dissect what went wrong, how it could have been avoided, and what you will do next time.

4. Care about people. If you’re the boss, hire slowly and cut your losses quickly when you make a hiring mistake. A great employee or partner is invaluable. Be a good leader. Inspire and reward. Take time to teach and groom the right people. Celebrate successes. You want your team to look forward to coming into work. If you’re not the boss, do not engage in gossip or negativity. Display a can-do attitude and build a good working relationship with your boss…ask him/her how you can do a better job.

3. Take time to take care of yourself–and others. Your business will not succeed if you are sick (or, worse yet, dead). Vacations, family time, exercise, healthy eating, and laughter are all important. Giving back to others (through non-profits, volunteer work, and involvement in your community) is not only good for society but they’ll make you feel better too. And you’ll meet some cool people (which can be good for business).

2. Don’t poo-poo or shy away from technology. It’s here to stay. Make it your friend but do not become its slave. Learn how to use social media to expand your circle and connect with customers. Get the right kind of training. Everyone these days claims to be a guru or rock star. Social media has only been around for a few years and was invented by a college kid–not a business man. It’s still in its infancy. We’re all still figuring out its true value, so make sure you’re not spending too much time “dabbling.” It’s an enhancement to traditional business–not a replacement. Buy and use only devices that will save you time and make your life easier. Don’t invest in technology just so you can feel groovier. And humanity is still REALLY important–maybe even more than ever before.

1. Listen to your customers. Respect your customers. At the end of the day, these are the people who keep you in business and can give you ideas that will make your business better. Know who your customers are, what they want, and how you can serve them better. In short, love your customers.

Nancy A. Shenker is the CEO and Founder of theONswitch, a marketing company that combines traditional and new media to build businesses. She is a late-life entrepreneur, having spent the first part of her career in executive positions at Reed Exhibitions, MasterCard International, and Citibank. She lives in Chappaqua and serves customers from coast-to-coast. Her latest venture, www.nunumedia.com, includes a series of business comic books called Bad Girl Good Business. She loves making lists.

By Lindsay Hand

Think you know everything there is to know about Chappaqua? Think again! Ever wonder about that old building on Quaker Street or where you can download music for free? There are countless things about Chappaqua and its resources, past and present, which many people don’t know. Here’s a list of ten things about Chappaqua that even the Quakers would find interesting.

10. Download free music using Freegal. There is a library of thousands of songs available through Sony. Just visit chappaqualibrary.org, click on “Freegal,” and then the link to sign in with your library card number. You are limited to three downloads per week, but can add songs to a wish list to download the following week. The music can be put on an MP3 player or an iPod. It’s a quick and easy way to download free music!

9. Find 58,000 free online video tutorials for computer programs. Flustered by the complications of today’s technology? Visit the library website and click on the link to Lynda.com for instruction on programs such as Final Cut Pro, Photoshop, Microsoft Office, Dreamweaver and more.

8. New Castle’s worst disaster occurred on Quaker Street
On July 16, 1904, a tornado zoomed down Quaker Street, stopping in front of the Quaker Meeting House. There were a few fatalities and five houses and three barns were completely destroyed. The damages totaled $100,000, which is the equivalent of approximately $2.4 million today.

7. A liberty ship was named “Chappaqua” During World War II, a liberty ship was name “Chappaqua” because of the large number of war bonds sold here. Liberty ships were slow cargo ships that were fast to construct and very reliable.

6. The original Horace Greeley School was in the Current Robert E. Bell School building.
The Horace Greeley School was built in 1928 after a fire devastated the Chappaqua Mountain Institute on Quaker Street in 1908. It was renamed the Robert E. Bell School when the new Horace Greeley High School was built in 1957. The three elementary schools were built in a 20-year period around this time as well.

5. You can borrow museum passes to visit many area museums for free. These passes include the following: the American Museum of Natural History, the Frick Collection, the Guggenheim Museum, the Intrepid Air and Space Museum, The Cooper-Hewitt National Design Museum, the Bruce Museum, the Aldrich Contemporary Art Museum, the Katonah Art Museum, the Neuberger Museum of Art, the New York Historical Society and the Stepping Stones Museum for Children.

Follow the same steps used to get to Freegal and you’ll find “Museum Passes.” As with the other online resources, you need to be a library cardholder in order to borrow
a pass.
4. The Library site has a special link for birding enthusiasts.
The link, through Cornell University, is called the Birds of North America. Click “Online Resources” (the first option) on the library website to get started.

3. The Quaker Meeting House was an important asset during the American Revolution.
The Quaker Meeting House was used as a hospital for some of Washington’s wounded soldiers after the Battle of White Plains on October 28, 1776.

2. The Library has 100 Reference Books online. At the library website, click “CREDO REFERENCE.” This site helps you search through many reliable sources and databases all at once. Just follow the steps to the login page, and type in your card number.

1. A major town Industry in the 19th century was pickle production. A large number of local orchards produced vinegar. In 1848, when the railroad first came to Chappaqua, farms began to grow and ship “cash crops.” The abundance of vinegar and other products led to the creation of cider mills, a pickle factory and a barrel factory.

So, next time you’re sitting around somewhere, you can pop out a random “Did you know?” and wow them with your knowledge of the Town of Chappaqua, known to the original Native American inhabitants as “Shapiqua.” Who knew?

Thank you to the Chappaqua Library, www.chappaqualibrary.org, and the New Castle Historical Society, www.newcastlehs.org. for providing such interesting background and resources about Chappaqua.

Lindsay Hand is a freshman at Horace Greeley High School. This is her second article for Inside Chappaqua.

By Sandy Hapoienu

My number one rule is to find the right fit for your body type. Nothing else matters if your clothes are too tight or if you look like you have a sack on. I recommend the following:

10. Animal Prints. A little goes a long way but be careful not to overdo it.

9. High Heels. They make your legs look longer so you look taller and skinnier. For me, the higher the better, but you will not look like a fashionista if you can’t walk in them. Simply, very high heels are not for everyone. You need to be able to bend your knees comfortably. Otherwise, you will look like you are on stilts.

Another factor that may deter you is the comfort factor. Some options that may help are inner soles or platforms. Stay away from pointed toe shoes!

8. A Fabulous Hat. It’s an instant way to hide a bad hair day while looking chic.

7. Red Lipstick. Don’t be afraid! Contrary to popular belief, red looks good on just about everyone. The most universal red has a blue undertone.

6. Sparkle. It’s still a trend and I don’t think it’s going away soon. It’s in and works on everything from make-up to clothes and accessories.

5. Scarf. What a great way to jazz up outerwear. There are so many ways to wear them and with all the variety of textures and prints, you can make one jacket look ten different ways. In the spring, try wearing a scarf with a tee-shirt.

4. Big Earrings. When I’m out all day and need to run to an evening event, I throw a pair of dramatic earrings in my bag. In an instant, your inner diva will surface after a long day.

3. Great Belt. Almost anything can be belted, and in most cases, it will enhance your look to give you an hourglass shape. Try it on everything from coats, faux fur vests, dresses and even ball gowns.

2. “It” Bag. I think every girl should have at least one over the top bag. It is one of the most valuable wardrobe investments you can make.

1. Sunglasses. Instant glamour! Need I say more?

Follow the trends but stay true to your personal style.

Sought after stylist and fashion columnist, Sandy Hapoienu, is known for her sharp eye and her sophisticated style. She covers all the major shows in New York including Fashion Week and The New York Gift Show. Sandy is also a Fashion Professor at SUNY Westchester. She has won awards for teaching and her commitment to education. Visit Sandy at stylingsession.com