My first American role model was ‘Eric’–I met him when I was just 10 and he was a lanky 19-year-old studying at UCSB. Though he might be glossed over by some as just another college student, to my English as a Second Language (ESL) classmates and me, he became our guide to the outside world. Despite not having a single language in common (Spanish, Chinese, German, Vietnamese) among ourselves, Eric still somehow managed to teach us all English. Through Apples to Apples, he gave us a basic vocabulary (and uncontrollable laughter–the universal language) that we could build upon. While trying to help us integrate into the broader community, he created one right within that class. Even after the course ended, people in that class remained some of my closest friends after elementary school and throughout middle school. We kept in contact even after some of us had to return to our home countries.
I am not sure if Eric knew that he had just fostered a dozen children and made us all feel at home in this foreign country for the first time. Inspired by Eric, I strive to pay the favor forward to other immigrant children by teaching ESL classes at Neighbors Link. In their confused eyes, I see my younger self who was equally perplexed by this odd world. Unable to communicate, there is no doubt that these children are feeling alone amongst their peers, just as I did.
Whenever I see this uncertain look in their eyes, it just drives me harder to help these children feel like a part of the community–not apart from it. Of all the children I tutor, eight-year-old Angel is the most difficult; yet he is the person I look forward to seeing every day. When he hurls books in frustration, I gently remind him, “These are the same words I once struggled with.” I want Angel to know that I will struggle through these words again for him.
In my sophomore year, as the Westchester County representative to Youth to Youth International, a youth leadership training camp, I learned leadership skills required to organize a community-based drug prevention program that focuses primarily on middle school and high school students. I met remarkable people with incredible stories of resilience as they fought their addictions to become coalition leaders. A common thread connecting their stories is the importance of communities in overcoming these substances, whether faith-based or a group of users struggling together. My peer leaders showed me the optimism and dedication it took to maintain a community in which everyone needed to believe the goal is achievable. This belief proved to be essential during a summer internship at our local New Castle United for Youth where I organized events with the goal of creating a support network that extends to all those who seek help in our town.
Through high school, I learned how to be someone my brother can confide to about his mental health; how to be a teacher who the children in my English-as-a-Second-Language (ESL) class can expect to not give up on them, even during the most difficult readings; and how to be a non-judgmental friend who can be turned to for advice with substance-problems.
Through these experiences, I can say that trust is not a ‘thing,’ but an action. It is a vulnerable act of giving something one values, knowing that person will take good care of it like they always had. It is the highest honor someone can be given by their loved ones–no wonder my grandma emphasized its importance so much. Trust is not a one-way street. Just like how my parents, brother, students, and peers rely on me, I am sure that they will be there when I need them. Most importantly, I can trust myself to be trusted.
“Kə’myōōnədē”, the word that would not roll off my tongue when I first came to America has now become my favorite. Whether it is in school or in town, I look for communities everywhere. After all, they are what hold us together.
Editor’s Note: Dang was honored on June 30th at Crabtree’s Kittle House with the Chappaqua Rotary Club’s Student Community Service Award; in addition, two-term Rotary president Eileen Gallagher–who received the Paul Harris service award the same day–presented Dang with a $1000 scholarship from the Rotary for his outstanding achievement and dedication to ‘Service above Self’.