Over the most recent holiday break, one of my college-age daughters showed me a new TikTok where young women, seemingly in their twenties, not yet mothers, post themselves on social media immersed in some travel or adventure or significant life experience. The videos begin with an enthusiastic “Hey kids, it’s your mom,” a nod to this moment that one day they will hopefully show their future brood.
To my daughter’s dismay, I had to first go find my reading glasses but then proceeded to watch these videos over and over before they fled the screen just as quickly as they appeared. Each one really struck me. I felt a sense of wonder (and maybe a small pang of envy) for what these vibrant young women were doing in their “best highlight reels” before motherhood. But I think I was most struck by their self-awareness and desire to acknowledge themselves as mothers before they became one! Was this declaration a way to manifest their destiny to be a mom or was it a rebellion against motherhood‘s impending lifestyle, therefore relishing the adventure even more? I was also overwhelmed with their ability to mark the moment as a young person pre-motherhood, realizing age and the passage of time are beyond their control. To me, it felt like in that recognition, they were confirming proof of the present even as their future was unfolding.
The passage of time is a crazy thing and something I, and I think many others in midlife, ponder often. It is completely uncomfortable and out of our control. Sitting at my computer in mid-January 2026, after my nest had just emptied again post-winter college break, I easily recognized the long distance between me, a midlife woman with four grown children, and these young, adventurous women not yet even knowing what their future as a mother might look like. I do know that had a palm size video camera been velcroed to my hand when I was their age, I would have also wanted to have that documentation. “Hey Kids, It’s Your Mom…I did exist before you came into my life. I did adventure.” How beautiful to have the awareness that I would want them to see the “me” before our family became a “we.”
I find that at this stage of my life, similar to many of my friends, my emotions are constantly teetering on the brim of my cup, often spilling over with either an overwhelming feeling of fulfillment or of loss–an upending cycle that seems to be, not surprisingly, in sync with the home-from-college calendar. This revolving door often feels like an acceleration of time with an inevitable end, creating an urge within me to also document and mark moments–not necessarily with TikTok highlight reels, but rather with old fashioned words on the blank page that won’t disappear with a tap or a scroll.
So, “Hey Kids, It’s Your Mom” –
Not only to my own kids, but also to all of the young women hoping to be mothers one day, please know that although I, too, once paraglided off mountains in Switzerland before there was any way to have video proof (you will just have to believe me!) and I am old enough to remember when tick tock actually referred to the two literal hands moving between the minutes on a clock, I can confidently confirm in writing that being a mom is my greatest, most fulfilling adventure yet.
To be continued….TikTok, tick tock
